If you have plans with a friend, and they text you that they are stuck in construction on the Beltway, you can expect to see them sometime mid-next week.

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. Ben Williams Dogs have given us their absolute all. We are the center of their universe.

My cheeks hurt from laughing so much!

Even if you’ve been of drinking age for several years, you still get that thrill of “Oh, my God, we get to have alcohol in public with the grown-ups” feeling when ordering your bloody marys out at brunch.

Don’t sleep with makeup on.

The final development of Ted’s character was learning to not be the man who lived in his stories: The story of how he met Tracey finally ended, and the rest of his life began.

I wonder what color Marilyn Monroe wore. That’s like, a red red. I should Google that.

This playlist could only be more flawless if “Murder Train” was on Spotify.

They can take the instrument out of your hands, but they can’t take the music out of your heart.