10 Signs You’re Still Figuring Yourself Out (And That’s Okay)

You’re not sure what the bigger picture is.

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people figuring life out, people sitting
Henri Pham

1. You’re not sure what the bigger picture is.

‘Look at the bigger picture,’ they said. ‘Trust the bigger picture,’ they said. But the problem is, what the f*ck is the bigger picture? We’ve heard those lines more than once and girl, trust me when I say you’re not the only one confused. I know it’s not always healthy to think this way – to draw strength from the fact that other people are confused too. But it’s a fact. You’re not the only one trying to figure out what the bigger picture is.

2. You don’t know when and how to start over.

You keep throwing your life down the drain because it sucks, and you’ve been told to start with a clean slate. So you dump everything in the toilet and flush, but for some reasons, the clean slate is more complicated than your messy life. Apparently, the starting over is kinda more difficult.

3. You’re clueless about what real success looks like.

Seriously, how the hell does success look? We all want to be successful, but how can we achieve that when we don’t know what it looks like? Nor do we know how successful should exactly feel like. Well, let’s just settle on the idea that success is you waking up in the morning, knowing you have a purpose. That’s not much but that’s not nothing either.

4. You can’t communicate well with the voices in your head.

Sometimes, I just want to be lost in the world of unicorns because there, I get to talk to unicorns. I don’t have to talk to the creepy voices in my head. See, it can be a struggle to be at peace with your guts, subconscious, and inner-self. Your mind is always chaotic you can barely hear yourself. Seriously, how do people deal with this?

5. You’re not sure how to let people in.

When we’re young, we spend years building walls because this world is so destructive and toxic and dangerous. Or so they say…problem is, how the hell do we build doors in those walls? How do we wreck them for good so we can let people in? How are we even supposed to let people in?

6. You don’t know how to embrace the process.

I guess we all don’t. We’ve been told countless times to embrace the process and not just focus on the goal. We’re told to enjoy the journey. We’re told to have fun because we’re young and life is full of surprises. But what really happens is we end up clawing our way through the journey, ruining our fancy polished nails just to get to the goal. It’s not a good way to achieve something but for people still figuring things out, this way will do.

7. You have a hard time escaping your dreams.

You know the best things about dreams? You don’t have to escape them. Heck! You wouldn’t want to escape them. But we all need to get back to reality somehow, so how exactly do we do that? How to we leave the good stuff behind for a boring 9-5 and an annoying roommate? Good lord, how do we bring dreams into this real world?

8. You always forget to lock the doors.

Sometimes, we need to let people in. Other times, we need to shut them out. Problem is, we have no way of knowing who to let in and who to shut out. We’re all creatures programmed to protect ourselves but for the love of all things holy, someone write a manual because this is crazy hard.

9. You’re still figuring out the whole ‘being alone’ thing.

Some people say the more alone time you have with yourself, the more you will know yourself. But sometimes, the more we spend some alone time with ourselves, the more ridiculous questions we come up with. We just end up complicating our lives even more. We ask a lot of questions about our past as if we can still do something to change it. And it doesn’t feel fair.

10. You suck at living and you don’t know when you’ll learn.

And then, when the day is over and we can finally pat ourselves in the back for surviving yet another rollercoaster, we lay in bed and say, ‘huh?’ Because really, that’s the only relevant expression we have. We did all these things and followed all the rules, and still, we’re clueless about life. How exactly does living take place? Well, maybe nobody really knows. Maybe we’re all still figuring it out. Thought Catalog Logo Mark


About the author

Tammy Danan

Part-poet, part-writer, and full-blooded human megaphone of the oppressed, Tammy is a freelance journalist/writer.