To The Man Who Marries My Mom Someday

I guess if you’re reading this that means you’re the guy. The lucky man. The “one.” Part of me wants to be stern, to give you a warning. To tell you if you hurt her I’ll break your legs. But that’s not really fair. That would be me bringing the past into the present, and you’re her future.

So I’ll start off with this: My hope for you is that you love her endlessly. I hope you’re what she’s always deserved, and I hope she’s all you’ve ever wanted. I hope you cherish her with ever fiber of you’re being, because she’s worth it. Oh gosh, she’s worth it.

She’s been hurt before, most of her life actually. So please take this into consideration when you get frustrated with her. I’d like to say you’ll never fight, and you’ll never get mad at her, but I know that’s not true. You’ll argue, and you’ll probably feel helpless at times. This is because her past hasn’t treated her as well as you have. She’s been taken for granted, abused, and misused. She’s been through hell and back. And hell leaves a scar. But don’t let this scare you, the power of hell pales in comparison to the power of love. And if you love her as wide and as deep as she deserves, she will heal. And the scars will fade, And all that you’ll be left with is the most beautiful woman in the world.

I mean that. I know every girl thinks her mom is the most beautiful woman in the world, but take my word for it. If beauty had a cover photo it would be a picture of her. Not just because of what you see on the outside. Believe me, her looks are gorgeous. And her smile lights up every room it enters, I’m sure I don’t need to tell you that though. But most of all, her soul is the most breathtaking thing in this world. It blows me away every time she talks, or looks at me, or even the thought of her.

I want her to be able to trust you, and I need you to trust her. She deserves that. She’s had too many people walk in and out of her life. I want her to know she can lean on you. I want her to trust you with her deepest secrets, and her silly side. And I hope the same for you.

Be authentic with her. Be real. Be yourself. There’s no part of you that will scare her away. Trust me, you don’t need to put on a front. And she should have someone who doesn’t put on one.

Don’t let her forget her worth. Sometimes she thinks her worth resides in the way other’s treat her or see her. And while I’m sure her worth would be safe in you, make sure it doesn’t live in you. Build her up so she can stand on her own two feet, but make sure she never has to.

See her strength, and remind her of it every time you see it. Call her beautiful. Never think that she’s heard it enough. Because she hasn’t. She has a whole life of not being told she’s beautiful to make up for, so shower her in reminders.

Show her affection. Lots. She loves that, and she needs it. Never let her doubt how much you love her. Make your love known to her, and the whole world will see it too. Show her off. Be proud of having her, and be proud of who she is.

Give her a wedding. A fairytale one. Let her plan every last detail, and act like you’re as excited about the color scheme as she is. Get married on the beach- she’s always dreamed of that. Make sure I’m sitting front row. Make sure my brothers are too. Cry when you see her walk down that isle, and don’t take your eyes off of her. Not for a second.

And I need you to do me a favor. I need you to love her children. I need you to love me. Because we are a part of her world, we’re actually her whole world. Don’t love us kids to please her, love us because you truly do. Every time she has hurt, we hurt with her, so we’ve got scars too. And because of this we need you to love us through our past too.

But most of all, love her. Love her as vastly as you have the ability to. Love her like you’ve never loved anything before her. Love her with the kind of love that takes the broken pieces and builds them back together. But don’t feel the need to put the pieces back the way they were. She’s not going back to that woman she used to be. Her life with you, is new. Leave a few cracks when you put her back together too, not because she’s broken, but so her inner beauty has room to shine through.

I hope you two have the kind of love that finishes each other’s sentences and can sit in silence and be completely content. I hope that you’re so in love that you two make me sick. I hope your love together is magic. Because true love is- it’s the most powerful thing on this earth, and she deserves that kind of love.

I love you; not just for being the person my mom falls madly in love with- but for loving her. Perhaps for the first time in her life, by any man. It takes a courageous man to love a woman who is so beautifully hand crafted, and it takes a special man for my mom to trust with her heart. To the man who marries my mom someday- thank you, for everything. And for being here to stay, for forever and a day. Welcome to our world, we love you.