25 Absolute Truths Womanhood Teaches You

Never cheap out on good make-up, toothbrushes, or bras.

There really is something to be said about the quality that goes into those things. I have never been one to spend a lot of money on weird things like that. I told myself it was all the same and bought the cheap stuff and spent money elsewhere. One day though I was converted and now I will never go back. These are your boobs and your teeth and your face, if you want to feel like a 10 you have to invest in it. Plus, the cost-benefit really is there, trust me I’ve done the math

Have a passion

Nothing is more attractive to another person than someone who cares deeply about something. Even if its something as dumb as vegan cooking or as legit as sports, a girl with a passion is a girl that’s undeniably sexy to men.

Always be a woman who loves animals

I really don’t know what it is about this but guys LOVE when girls like animals. I am obsessed with all animals (especially cats) and though I get a lot of jokes about my future as a crazy cat lady (something I am legit looking forward to with open arms) guys eat it up! I don’t know, maybe they think I’m maternal or something…?

Always be wary of someone who does not like animals (totally different from someone who just doesn’t want a pet)

I have learned that someone who doesn’t like animals is someone you definitely should not like. How do you not like animals? Seriously? They are perfect and adorable and literally are the most perfect creatures in existence. If someone doesn’t like animals, that’s a HUGE red flag that screams sociopath to me.

Always be a woman with standards

I’m not saying you have to be a prude or anything but be a woman who respects herself enough to not be a one-night stand. Additionally, having standards can also have nothing to do with sex; it can just as easily mean that you are someone who expects a man to be traditional (a car door-opener, walk you to the door, call you first, etc.). Whatever your standards are, have them and stick to them and if you find a man that won’t respect your standards then you have found a man who does not deserve your time. Fun fact, guys love girls with expectations. Makes them want to rise to the occasion, and makes you hotter to them. Win-win.

Make-up should enhance, not mask, your appearance

I see this fatal flaw all the time and hear about it ceaselessly from my male friends. Girls, makeup should never hide who you are and what you look like, it is there to enhance your features not completely morph you. Use it sparingly yet properly. That’s the other problem I see consistently. Women who have no clue how to apply their makeup end up looking like they crawled out from behind a trashcan. DO NOT BE THAT WOMAN

Being told you are a “natural beauty,” is one of the best compliments you can ever receive

See above. No but really, being told women are not pretty without makeup is the worst and best lie that we as women have ever been fed. Imagine how insane it would be if one day we all just woke up and realized how pretty we are naturally and stopped funding the makeup companies. The fashion world would implode… it’d be awesome.

Build strong family relationships

Your family members are the only people who have known you before you even knew you. Don’t take any of them for granted. They are the roots to your tree that keep you grounded in this life and when your parents and grandparents pass away all that’s left are your siblings/cousins/etc. I invite you to call/text/email a member of your family and tell them you love them. Do it right now, you’ll feel great and so will they.

Be a woman of intelligence and substance

There is literally nothing more unattractive than a dumb woman. No real man wants to date a girl who they can’t carry on a conversation with. It’s embarrassing yet also hilarious to see people try though. Additionally, don’t be a woman who hides her intelligence behind a ditzy façade. I have more than a few friends who do this and it’s so confusing to me. Girlfriend, you are in law school obviously you are not dumb, stop acting like it!

NEVER DATE AN ADDICT

I’ve made this mistake more times than I can even begin to explain. This actually should be its own post that’s how much I have to say on the matter but to make a horribly long story short, addicts will never love you as much as they love their drug (whatever it may be) and you are way to important to play second fiddle to a substance. Run away sister, RUN AWAY.

Be wary of the man who won’t pay for dates (actually, screw him and don’t talk to him again)

This is another topic that I have extensive experience on. If a man is trying to woo a lady, laziness (and cheapness) will never do. You should offer but he should NEVER accept said offer, and if he does NEVER SPEAK TO HIM AGAIN.

Be fit; You will never feel good about yourself if you are overweight

I’m not pushing the rail-thin agenda; all I am saying is to be at a healthy (and realistic) weight for your height and body type. There is so much science behind how important it is to be fit yet Americans are still the fattest people in the world. If you want to eat the ice cream, eat it but then go to the gym and work it off. You’ll thank yourself in when you see the changes in 3 months.

ALWAYS WEAR SUNSCREEN

Your face is your first and most important feature. It’s your biggest calling card. Take care of it. I can really tell the difference between my friends who do wear sunscreen and those who don’t. The ones who don’t look at least 5 years older than those of us who do. It’s only going to get worse as we progress though life so take care of it now. Sunspots are not sexy.

A good pair of sunglasses can change your whole world

The same way you’d protect your face from harmful sunrays you should be protecting your eyes. Plus nothing is cooler than really great shades and the darker they are the better they are for creeping

Same with a good pair of heels

Invest in good shoes for all different aspects of life. If you are going to be wearing heels for hours on end, the more expensive ones are going to be more comfortable. That being said don’t spend money on shoes that are not comfortable. It literally makes no sense to me when I see this. Also, if you wear them to the club you better wear them home. Don’t be a wimp and take them off halfway through the night because “your feet hurt!” There are few things I find more disgusting than seeing barefoot girls walking on the street. Its pathetic and unsanitary and completely unsexy. Don’t be that girl.

Be self-sufficient

You should never need a man to support you. Get an education, be able to support yourself. If you want to be a stay at home mom, then do it but never be a woman who has to rely on her man. No one likes that. Be a complete person and your relationship will be even that much stronger.

FOR THE LOVE OF THE CHILDREN wear the tampon not a pad

I do not understand why this is even an issue but it is. I literally want to barf and die when I see the telltale wave of the pad. It’s so gross and I just can’t. We cannot be friends if you wear pads in public — I will begrudgingly allow it to happen at night but I still think it’s the grossest thing in the world.

Maybe you aren’t depressed, maybe you’re just surrounded by assholes (but depression is a real thing so it could also be that)

Mental illness is completely and totally real. I suffer from it and being in law school, I can’t even begin to tell you how many other people I know who suffer some form of neurosis. But before you go and self diagnose as being affected by this, consider your company. If you are hanging around a-holes who do nothing but make you feel bad of course you are going to feel depressed. Negative people do not contribute to a happy life. Punt those losers and find people that are happy and become friends with them, your whole outlook on life can really change when you change the people you associate with.

Mentor someone/ take the leadership position

This falls in line with having a passion. Life only gives what you are willing to give. If you do nothing but stay home and watch TV you are not going to be fulfilled. Give back; find an organization to be apart of. Help someone out. Do something. We only have a finite amount of time on the planet, serving others is the best way to fill that time and make it worth-while.

Be a woman who reads

Seriously, nothing is sexier than a woman who reads. Guys EAT THAT SHIZ UP. Plus reading gives you the added benefit of amusement, an expanded vocabulary, strengthens your creativity, and can help you find a passion. Additionally, books rock. Duh.

HUSTLE FOR WHAT YOU WANT

Passive people are never the ones who make history (or millions of dollars). Nothing will ever be handed to you on a glided platter my friends so if you want something make it happen. Attend the networking events, talk to the guy at the bar, and go take the dance class you’ve been dying to try. If you want it, go get it. This is one of the many talents sorority taught me, I can hustle for days and that’s why I’ve been so successful in my professional and personal life. I make things happen and you should too.

If he isn’t that into you, don’t be that into him (do you boo, do you)

Don’t let some guy who doesn’t care about you determine how you feel about you. If he isn’t interested, (and if you have to question it, he probably isn’t) then move on. Life is way to short to be wasted waiting for some douche to decide he cares about you. Become the best version of you possible and you will attract the right type of men, this is I can promise you.

Your girlfriends are the greatest assets in your life (next to family), don’t abuse those relationships

I use to completely undervalue my relationships with my girlfriends, and then I wondered why I felt so alone all the time. My girl friends are the very best people I know and most I haven’t known for very long. When you find good people, don’t let them go because they bring something completely invaluable to the table and though I can’t really put my finger on what it is exactly, knowing that I can talk to any of them about anything that’s going on makes life just that more enjoyable. Additionally, the group message option on the iPhone has literally been my favorite invention because I can hit up my different friends and its like we are all in the same room talking about the same things. It’s the best.

Make an effort for those who make efforts for you

I have a friend who is literally the most wonderful person I know. She will literally give you the shirt off her back if you need and ask for it. Because I know she does so much for me I NEVER skimp on when she needs me. If someone is going to make an effort to be a good friend for you, you had better be prepared to be the same for that person. They are those invaluable humans who should never be allowed to leave your life because, like unicorns, they are rare and magical and are one in a million.

Never underestimate the power of vitamin D when you’re feeling down 

If you are having a bad day, I highly suggest going and sitting outside. Just 15 minutes of sunshine is proven to boost your mood considerably and that’s because vitamin D is the greatest thing ever. I pity all you people who live in Forks, Washington and never get to see the sun but its fabulous and I hope you move. San Diego is great this time of year (actually San Diego is great every time during the year).