A Love Letter I Never Got To Send

To the boy I love,

I love you so much it hurts. We’re so young and we have so much life ahead of us that it hurts knowing that there might be a day that you’re not in my life anymore, and I know that nothing lasts forever, but I hope like hell that you’re my nothing.

I don’t love you just because you’re there, I love you because we can have rap battles. I love you because you’re not embarrassed to dance with me in public. I love you because you give me massages at 2 a.m. when I know you just want to sleep. I love you because we can lay on top of a car and talk about life while the moon shines down on us. I love you because you always give me your side of pickles. I love you because you make the little moments in life grand.

I can’t guarantee that we are going to be perfect, but I can guarantee that I will love you till the end. I will love you when you just want to sit in silence. I will love you when you have a bad day. I will love you when we fight. I will love you when we don’t talk. I will love all of yo—the good, the bad, and everything in between.

I have never been a sure girl. I always second guess everything in my life, from what I’m wearing to what I want to be when I grow up. But one thing that I am so sure of is you. I am sure that you are the first thing I want to see in the morning and last thing I hear at night. I am sure of love with you. I feel sure when it comes to you.

I never believed in marriage. I never believed that marriage is the end goal. I have always believed that if you love someone, you don’t need it on a piece of paper to prove it. I never understood any of it till I met you, mostly because almost every marriage I have seen has ended with divorce. I never understood why anyone would give someone that much power to break them till I met you.

When our love developed into something more, I understood every little twist and turn of marriage. When you get married, that is your person that you vow to spend the rest of your life with. It’s probably scary not knowing if you’ll actually stick to the vows, but in that moment, when you are standing across the person you love most, you have all the faith in the world that no matter what happens, you have someone, and that is magical. You are the person I want to experience that magic with.

I’m not sure where I am going with this letter, but the last thing I want to say to you is thank you. Thank you for letting me love you and loving me back just as much. Thank you for coming into my life and making me question everything I have always believed in. Thank you for all these special moments that I will forever cherish. Thank you for being you.