I Am A Woman Who Is Playing For Legacy

I am playing for the girl I used to be. The one who never felt like she belonged.

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Riki Ramdani / Unsplash

I am not playing for wealth.

Money would be nice, but the stuff it buys only clutters our homes, then our hearts.

I am not playing for fame.

I don’t want to be another superficial star. I have no plans to make a career based on how pretty I can get my photos to look. I don’t want people to recognize me as I walk down the street. The real stars are the ones who continue to illuminate the skies through whatever darkness sets in. They lead from the front, their cause is clear, and they never pretend to be something they are not.

I am playing for all of the women in this world who are oppressed, silenced and imprisoned. Those who have had their voice stolen, their heart frozen, and their dignity smashed to pieces.

I am playing for that young girl somewhere who’s scrolling through her Instagram feed and hating on her beautiful body. The one who can’t look in the mirror without seeing a list of broken things to fix. Because she doesn’t look like they do, and she believes that makes her worthless.

I am playing for the women who have had their power stripped from them by men who do not deserve the earth they walk on. For every woman who has ever been touched, beaten, abused, or raped. And every woman who has risen and reclaimed her power, despite her pain.

I am playing for love. I will continue to spread and speak of kindness, generosity, and Because there’s already enough poison in this world, and we all could do with a little more love.

I am playing for my family. For everything you have given me, the lessons I have learned, and the love I cannot put a price on. For the hardships you have endured, and the risks you have taken for me to be here today.

I am playing for pride. Because it’s easy to take your clothes off. It’s easy to sell out or sell yourself short. It’s easy to follow the money, leaving a trail of excuses along with your values along the way. It’s harder to stay true to who you are, and what you believe in.

I am playing for all of the ones who said I could not, that I would not, or I should not. Your judgment, rejections, and teardowns only made me fight back harder and made me hungrier. And in its own sweet time, my legacy will prove you wrong.

I am playing for the women who have ever felt alone in this world. The ones who are sleeping next to someone out of fear of being on their own, yet somehow end up being the loneliest ones of us all. The ones who think they’re incomplete on their own, and the ones who think that someone else’s love will help them love themselves.

I am playing for the ones who never seemed to fit. The freaks, the geeks, and the minorities. Anyone who has ever felt like an outsider. Anyone who has ever felt they need to wear a mask in order to be accepted and valued.

I am playing for the girl I used to be. The one who never felt like she belonged. The one who wished she could wake up as somebody else. The one who didn’t believe in herself and the voice she was graciously gifted.

I am a woman who is playing for legacy.

What will yours be? Thought Catalog Logo Mark


About the author

Shani Jayawardena

I hold a mirror to your soul, so you can see how beautiful you are