Shahida Arabi
Shahida is a graduate of Harvard University and Columbia University. She is a published researcher and author of Power: Surviving and Thriving After Narcissistic Abuse and Breaking Trauma Bonds with Narcissists and Psychopaths. Her books have been translated into 16+ languages all over the world. Her work has been featured on Salon, HuffPost, Inc., Bustle, Psychology Today, Healthline, VICE, NYDaily News and more. For more inspiration and insight on manipulation and red flags, follow her on Instagram here.
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8 Red Flag Text Messages Narcissists Send You – Translated By An Expert
When the narcissist first love-bombs you, they seem to have all the time in the world to communicate with you. After they’ve “hooked” you, however, their communication patterns shift abruptly in ways that give you emotional whiplash. An expert reveals the eight most common red flag text messages from narcissists and what they really mean.
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10 Red Flags of Narcissists on Dating Apps You Should Never Ignore
Watch out for these ten red flags of narcissists and manipulators on dating apps, especially if you're a woman.
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An Expert Reveals the 6 Stages of Trauma Bonding with Narcissists
As a researcher specializing in narcissism and psychopathy, I have noticed there are six common stages of trauma bonding that survivors of narcissists often go through before they become sufficiently “hooked” into the toxic relationship cycle. A trauma bond is an inextricable bond we develop with abusers through a power imbalance, intermittent reinforcement such as…
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Why So Many Men Are Threatened By Smart and Successful Women in the Dating World – According to Research
Studies reveal that smart and successful women trigger a man's ego - but why?
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23 Things Only People Who Were Raised By Narcissistic Parents Will Understand
To you, dangerous people feel like home. You "thrive" in fantasy relationships because you feel safe with people you know you have no future with. You fear abandonment yet abandon yourself.
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Stole Your Man or Woman: Mate Poaching is Related To Psychopathic Traits, Research Finds
Mate poaching or partner poaching is when someone deliberately and knowingly pursues those who are already in a committed romantic relationship. It is associated with darker personality traits. We’ve all heard the phrase, “A real man (or woman) can never be stolen.” While that may be true, that doesn’t mean partner poachers won’t try regardless…
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4 Trauma Responses That Double As Superpowers
As a researcher specializing in trauma, I find that survivors of trauma often identify both the positive and maladaptive elements of their trauma responses while still validating the pain they experienced. When we think of trauma responses, we often focus on how they impair and debilitate us, and for good reason. When our trauma responses…
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A Researcher Reveals the Early Warning Signs of Narcissistic and Psychopathic Children
Although neither narcissism or psychopathy can be diagnosed in children, research shows there are often early warning signs that point to harmful behaviors and traits that can persist into adulthood. We also have measures and indicators to capture these emerging tendencies. When we think of “psychopathy” and “narcissism,” the last image that comes to mind…
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Law and Order: SVU’s Best ‘Psychopaths and Narcissists’ Episodes
Law and Order: Special Victims Unit is one of the most captivating crime drama television shows, spanning an impressive 24 seasons. Long-time viewers have a deep love for Detectives Olivia Benson and Elliot Stabler and enjoy watching the victims of horrific crimes get justice while exposing their perpetrators. These perpetrators often have narcissistic or psychopathic…
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How to Reparent Yourself If You’re The Child of a Narcissistic Parent
Children of narcissistic parents can suffer long-lasting effects in adulthood that affect their self-esteem, mental health, their susceptibility to re-traumatization, and emotional regulation. As a researcher specializing in narcissism, I’ve spoken to not only thousands of people involved in romantic relationships with narcissistic partners but also many adult children of narcissists who struggle with the…
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8 Sinister Micro-Habits of The Female Narcissist in Friendships
As a researcher specializing in narcissism and psychopathy, I’ve written before about the manipulation tactics of female narcissists and how they can affect their loved ones in majorly harmful ways. Yet there are even more subtle signals you may be dealing with a female narcissist that you might not notice at first until they culminate.…
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It’s Time to Stop Being the Bigger Person: The Real Reason Narcissists and Toxic People Push Fake Morality
The problem with always feeling responsible for being the bigger person and “mature” in every situation and emotionally bypassing is that you never assign blame to the true perpetrator and end up punishing yourself due to misplaced self-blame.
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An Expert Reveals the Micro-Betrayals Narcissistic Partners Subject You To
Micro-betrayals are the seemingly “smaller” transgressions that act as the ominous harbingers of the greater betrayals to come. They can build up over time to become major red flags. As a researcher specializing in narcissism and psychopathy, I have heard from thousands of survivors who have experienced narcissistic partners on what makes these exploitative relationships…
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6 Dating Red Flags of Narcissists Most People Mistake As Green Flags
There are certain seeming “green flags” that are actually the dating red flags of a narcissist. The last one may surprise you. Love bombing is viewed as “finally” meeting your soulmate. Most people see excessive affection, attention, and contact at the onset of dating as a sign that the relationship is making progress. Yet there’s…
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5 Signs You’re a Highly Sensitive Person, Even If You Don’t Realize It
Are you what researchers call a “highly sensitive person”? High sensitivity is an innate, genetic trait that appears in 15-20% of the population. Researchers note that high sensitivity is linked to ten different gene variations on seven dopamine-controlling genes as well as a genetic variation that can affect the amount of serotonin available in the brain. The…
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Never Ask An INFJ To Do These 5 Things
The INFJ (standing for Introversion (I), Intuition (N), Feeling (F), Judgment (J)) is the rarest Myers-Briggs personality type, making up 1-2% of the population.They have a “darker” side that allows them to harness their traits powerfully to seek justice. Here are five things you must never ask an INFJ to do.
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10 Clever Ways to Fool A Narcissist To Keep Yourself Safe
If you want to fool a narcissist to keep yourself safe, here are ten clever ways to do so.
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How NOT To Raise a Narcissist: A Step-By-Step Guide
Don't stay together for the children. Model empathy, boundaries, and accountability instead.