To My Best Friend Who Is Struggling Right Now

I’m looking at her right now, it’s 2 am. in the morning and she’s finally asleep. This is my best friend I’m talking about. We’ve known each other ever since we were kids, and are love bonded sisters. No blood relation can compare to this.

She’s a little troubled now, and for every single soul that reads this, I only ask for one prayer for her – some magical fairy dust.

So, here she is, right by my side, lying peacefully on the bed with her eyes closed. It’s a miracle that she got some sleep after all! Heaven knows she’s been trying for too long. She’s the prettiest girl you’ll ever meet, with her skin white as snow, lips pink as roses, hair jet black, and all she can do is point flaws within her. You will always find her complaining about her wrecked nose, her manly eyebrows, or her constant hair fall. She misses every single thing that I see. Sad, but true. I only realized how close the distance between us has got us; how much we’ve shared despite being in different parts of the country; how much head over heels we are for each other.

We are so in love, and not just now, but even when we were little. Our lives revolve around each other.

I am her sun and she is my moon.

In case you’re wondering why now, it’s because she is not happy, and the fact that the thought of me leaving her behind for another six months drives her insanely sleepless, just makes me restless and uneasy. How do I repay her for the never ending unconditional love she is offering me? I love her too – equally and more, but my disability to pour out love and have my heart on my sleeve, gives me no choice. I’m sure you must know the feeling of not being loved back, feeling left unloved, or not being able to give so much, and it’s not a good feeling. This is something that can lurk upon you for days, weeks, or even months to make you feel guilty, even though you gave up all that you had to.

For me, she is the sister I never had, the one I can share my darkest secrets with, open my book of miseries with, exchange clothes with, and give her everything that she’s ever wanted.

I want to keep her from every harm, and where she is now, is no walk in the park for her. I adore her too much to see her go through this. There is no such thing as regrets with you baby, no such thing as looking back. I’ve chosen you over everyone else for the past 17 years and I always will. My indifference for every other human being when I’m with you, or after I’ve been with you, is just another way of saying that. When you talk in your sleep, it sure is funny as fuck and I laugh all I want before I wake you up, but I want you to get out of it because we both know it’s no good. I want you to stop taking those awful pills, and be in your senses again. I want you to stop falling asleep at the wrong times and not sleeping when it’s actually needed (God you’re an idiot!).

And because we’re friends and not really sisters, we’re way beyond just sisters. In fact, no label will ever be good enough for what we are. We are there for and with each other through all thick-and- thin. I’m always ready to kick as many asses as you want me to – be it some illness or some fuckboy.

Even if we weren’t meant for each other, we are now and will always be. Like I said, I love you to death darling. Get well soon.