“They told me my hair was unprofessional, that it wasn’t appropriate for the workplace.”

It’s been a long minute since I’ve kissed anyone. So… when the opportunity came up recently, you have no idea how much I wanted to kiss her.

Con: Gloria Steinem would totally not sit with you.

When I was 5, I wrote my first book.

When we live and travel abroad, every little nuance — the cracks in the sidewalk, the smell of fresh pastries, the wide horizon in the distance — all seem new.

There are many reasons why working on cruise ships is a wonderful opportunity, not limited to getting paid to travel, exploring new places, meeting rad people from all over the world and seeing the sun set over the water in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean.

As the reality of what I’d gotten myself into set in, I began to have doubts. Maybe my parents were correct and I was, in fact, an absolute loon.

If your school is in a snowy area, cafeteria trays make great sleds.

Did you know that Hillary Clinton and Dame Judi Dench got slimed on Figure It Out, Nicolas Cage once appeared in Blue’s Clues and Skeeter was actually a member of the Illuminati?

Where does the money that we all work so hard to make go at the end of the week?

Deleting people off of Facebook who are constantly spouting off political or social stuff that makes you extremely upset, or feel personally attacked.

This is the account of an intelligent, lucid man who knew perfectly well what he was doing and did it with the intent of leaving a minimum amount of pain or confusion.