If I Could Have A Conversation With Myself, This Is What I’d Say

I know it’s been a while since we’ve had a heart to heart. I’ve been busy. It’s hard trying to make time for you while having time for everything else. I forget about you a lot. Most times, I put you last. I don’t even think of you as a priority. You needed me a few times, but I dropped the ball. I know it must have hurt you. I know you must be suffering, but you do it in silence. You let me think that everything’s okay because you don’t want to be a burden. I see what I’m doing to you, but I still turn a blind eye. I’ve been neglecting you. I know. I’m here now, ready to give you tender, loving care.

If I could put into words how much I’ve missed you, I would, but whatever statement I make would be an understatement. Even though I’ve been absent, I still need you. I’ve always needed you. You are my glue. You are everything that makes me, me. I miss when we were on one accord. I miss when were in unison. I don’t like this distance between us. I don’t like what the separation has done to us. We don’t get along anymore. I feel like I’m at war with you constantly. I don’t like being at war with myself. I miss being me. I miss being myself.

I know that it doesn’t seem like it right now, but I love you. I love you more than the both of us can comprehend. No, I’m not being weird. I know we’re one, but with all that’s been going on, I feel like we’re two different people. I just had to let you know how I felt. I just had to let you know that I know how you feel. It’s time that I reminded you that no one else is more important to me than you. And I could say that I won’t treat you like this again, but I know will. I’m only human, and the most human thing I could do right now is admit that I’m wrong. I’m wrong for how I’ve neglected you. I’m wrong for how I’ve been so distant with you. Never let that take away from how much I love you. I don’t ever want to forget how to love myself first again.