33 Of The Smoothest Pickup Lines You’ll Ever Hear

1. I saw this girl going through Tinder on her phone. I said, “I’ve got a tip for your Tinder,” and when she asked what it was, I said, “Delete it and go out with me.”

We went on a couple of dates.

2. A girl I’d been friends with for a while was lightly fretting because she’d been casually dating a guy another town over for a few weeks, and she was supposed to drive down to see him that weekend but she’d decided she didn’t really want to date him anymore and wanted an excuse not to make the trip while she decided how to break up with him.

I said, “That’s easy, just tell him you’re going on a date with me instead.”

“Why would I do that?”

“Because, hopefully, you’re going on a date with me instead.”

Been 20 years as of last May.

3. So my old Tinder bio used to say something like, “Never knew how many women in the area had no desire to date me but now, thanks to Tinder, I have the complete list!”

This girl I matched with’s opening like to me was, “Well I’m definitely not on that list.”

She was one of very very few women who ever messaged me first.

I was charmed, asked her out and its only been 6 months but we are still going strong.

4. Had to change out of my clothes and into my bathing suit in a park and asked my friend if he’d seen my boobs. “No, but could we fix that?” Yeah. We fixed that.

5. This was on Tinder:

Guy: Hey what’s up?

Me: Not much. What about you?

Guy: Not much. Thinking about what I’m gonna cook you for breakfast this weekend.

panties drop

One of my friends said it was cheesy. But I loved it because he seemed so confident and he had nothing to lose. Fell for it immediately.

6. A girl came up to me in a nightclub and was told beforehand by her friends who I know that I was not feeling the best (life issues).

She came up to me and said, “My doors are always open,” and winked at me.

That means two things. And I went into both that night.

7. Through texts:

Me: 🔫

Her: What’s that?

Me: That’s me shooting my shot.

8. Me: Excuse me I’m having trouble with my phone, can you help me?

Her: Uh sure. Do you need to borrow mine to call someone?

Me: No, see, every time I want to call you to ask you out on a date, I can’t seem to find your number in my contacts. Could you fix that?

Her: Alright, you got me there.

9. How my boyfriend asked me out on our first date!

He was picking out seeds from dates (you already know how this is going), I saw him and decided to steal one of the dates he finished up. “You like dates?” I said yes, I do. “Well, do you wanna go on a date with me?” I felt my heart burst out of my chest and immediately said yes! 2 years strong now.

10. There was a cute girl at the library at my school.

I walked in and asked her if she could help me find a book.

She asked, “What’s the name of the book?”

I replied, “It’s called ‘Will you go out with me this Friday night at 8? The author is (my name).”

It worked. We dated for a while.

Thinking about it, I can’t believe that worked.

11. I was on the worst date of my life, and I went to the bar to buy another beer. He came over, bought my beer for me, and then said ‘give me your number, I’ll call you in five minutes and say your grandma died’. I gave him my number, and he called me, and I bailed on the date. We got drunk and had a lot of fun for the next 3-4 weeks. It was awesome.

12. A pick up line that actually worked on me needs just a little background.

I worked at a bar during the NBA finals. I don’t follow basketball at all, but I knew Golden State Warriors were playing by the simple fact that I look A LOT like Steph Curry. So much so that almost every table would say something. Anyway, onto the line.

I was outside and a cute woman asked, “Has anyone ever said you look like Steph Curry?” Obviously I said I get it all the time. Then she goes on to say, “Has anyone ever said they want to sit on your face because you look like him? No, just me?” And walked the fuck away to her table. Needless to say my jaw was on the floor.

13. So, not a pick-up line per say, but I was asked “Would you rather sleep in, go to the gym, or have aggressive mimosas on a Sunday morning?” on OkCupid.

I laughed and replied all three, and he agreed.

We’ve been married nearly two years now so I’d say it worked.

I think even if it was a copy and paste question to girls he messaged, it did show an interesting amount of thought and showed how an individuals personality would match or not match if they were all gung ho about one or the other.

14. My greatest relationship to date was started when I texted, “I like food, you like food, want to get some food?” Ironically we both ordered shakes and no food. We dated for 3 years.

15. This guy who clearly likes me (has been hitting on me for weeks) was like, “Hey, you need to hold this,” as he had his hand curled in a fist, hiding whatever would be in his hand. He then grabs my hand to put whatever it is in my hand, but just ends up uncurling his fist and interlocking his fingers with mine.

I died laughing. It was quite charming.

16. Used this one on my college campus.

“Hello Miss. Quick question for a survey: If a guy was interested in you, do you prefer that he walk straight up to you and introduce himself or should he be more indirect about it?”

The usual answer is, “I want him to walk right up to me and tell me!” to which I can respond, “In that case, ‘Hi I’m CodyDelish whats your name?”

Usually gets a laugh and gets things rolling.

17. Welcome Week my freshman year of college I was sitting on the shoulders of another girl from my dorm as we wandered around an event. She was about 5’4″. (Relevant, I promise!)

After a while this guy who was like 6’3″ came up and asked me, “Would you like a higher ride?”

We were together for the rest of the semester.

18. Not me but I saw my roommate get laid once by saying, “So do you have a bed?”

She said, “Yeaaaah? You want to like, see it?”

They disappeared and met us later at a different place.

I tried a few times, never worked out.

19. In college in the ‘80’s, a mildly buzzed girl friend of mine met me at the keg. We were just talking when she said, out of nowhere, “We’re buddies, right?” I was amused and nodded. She added, “Because, friends are friends but buddies fuck,” and stared at me.

So, yeah, we were buddies.

20. “Where do I know you from? I swear we’ve met before.”

It’s a great ice breaker. Even if we’ve never met, we both go back through our histories to try and find out where we “met”. Before you know it you’re having a solid conversation and finding out a lot of stuff about each other.

Worked pretty well for me in college.

21. A cute 20-year-old walked into the music store I worked at in the late 80’s, chewing on a straw. I’m normally shy but pulled it out of his mouth and said, “May I help you?”

He left his number and “let’s split a bottle of champagne” on the receipt.

I called… after marriage and two kids and 21 years… he died. I wish I had that straw.

22. A guy passed me a note, middle school style, with boxes (yes/no/maybe) to check, asking if I’d go out with him. Had never spoken before that day. Our 7 year wedding anniversary is in 2 days.

23. I didn’t personally use this (because I don’t have brass balls) but saw it with my own eyes when my brother asked some woman he’d never met before if “she wanted to get high and fuck.” Simple question he got a simple yes to.

24. “What’s a pretty girl like you got to cry about?”

I was at a bar, got into a fight with my sister and she left me there. I was outside, crying on the curb and he hit me with that.

That night, we slept together. When I woke up, we didn’t know each other’s names. 9 years later, we’re husband and wife.

Even today when I cry about something he will say, “Oh looks like I’m getting laid tonight.”

25. I was at a dive bar wearing a shirt with Link (Legend of Zelda) on it in an action pose.

There was a small dance floor at the bar, but I had absolutely zero interest in dancing. I was mostly at the bar to play pool with my friends, and polish off a pitcher or two.

I lost a game, so I was standing off to the side watching my buddies play their game, and glancing around this shitty dive bar as I was “people watching”.

A girl approached me, looked towards the dance floor and said, “It’s dangerous to go alone… take this” and held out her hand.

Her pick-up line definitely worked.

26. My now-boyfriend posted a photo of himself in a suit in his IG story, referencing a wedding he went to. I slid into his DM’s saying, “I have a few weddings I need a date for.” He responded and we’ve been together ever since. Side note: We didn’t know each other before either.

27. I was chatting to a girl in the bar at uni, she was wearing very tight skinny jeans. I asked her, “How do you get into those?”

She smirked and said, “Buying me another drink would be a good start.”

Much fun ensued.

28. I was on a road trip through California with a buddy of mine a few years back. When we reached San Diego, the first thing we did was check into our hotel.

Just as I got out of the car, I met a group of girls who did bachelorette dares. One of the bridesmaids approached me and asked if I had a condom. I reacted surprisingly witty and responded:

“Sure I do, but shouldn’t we at least have a drink first or something?!”

She looked at me with her eyes wide open, blushed a little, started to laugh and rushed back to her girls, asking, “OMG! Did you hear what that guy over there said?!”, pointing at me.

Turns out there was a party on the hotel’s rooftop terrace that night and the girls were staying there as well. A few of them were also attending the party. So I took my chances, approached her and said, “So, how about that drink now?” We then proceeded to have a few cocktails at the bar and the rest is history.

God, I love San Diego.

29. While avoiding a drunk girl at a Halloween party who was stalking me I ducked behind a group of girls and asked one if she would pretend to be my girlfriend so this other girl would leave me alone. Someone walked up and handcuffed us together with fake handcuffs and we started dating. Now we’re married.

30. I have bright blue eyes, that apparently look great if I wear a blue.

So, out in a blue shirt, a girl came up and said, “Oh my god your eyes are beautiful!”

Having just painted my room the same color blue as my shirt, I replied, “You should see how good they look in my bedroom!”

I guess both of our pickup lines worked, even if mine was totally unintentional.

31. In the middle of a playful conversation she says to me, “What are you going to do about it?”

32. A few years back I gave a guy I had a crush on but had never actually spoken to a Valentine’s Day card saying I wanted him to choke me the way the Falcons had choked in the Super Bowl against the Patriots.

We have a cat together now, so that’s about as good an outcome as you can hope for.

33. Went to a party. Had my top couple buttons undone. Girl came over and unbuttoned one more and said she was trying to help me get laid. Happy I took up on that hint.