50 Secrets Your Girlfriend Has Been Keeping From You

1. Half the time I’m “readjusting” my bra I’m actually trying to scratch my nipple.

2. If you have sex without a condom, we need a good few minutes after to let everything ~drain~ out of us.

3. We are almost always at least a little wet. It’s not that you’re hot, our bodies just need to be to function.

4. Some of us get extremely horny during the period, or little before that. Not the best timing, and not so many men dig it.

5. Boob acne is a thing that happens and it’s perfectly normal, trust me. Same with stretch marks around the breasts and thighs.

6. I lift my boobs up so I feel like I can breath without the weight of them. Have no idea if anyone else does this tbh. It’s a great feeling.

7. We have so many hair related issues… plucking dark random nipple hairs, trying to line up when we shave our areas to when we hook up to avoid guys from seeing razor burn or ingrown hairs, before getting out of the shower we have to pick out hair from our butt crack that fell out from washing our hair, pubes growing and sticking out of our undies, pubes getting stuck in pads or liners…

8. When we say “don’t stop” during sex it means “don’t stop doing what you are doing” don’t go harder, don’t go faster…. just don’t stop doing it exactly as you are right now. It seems that when this is said the guy speeds up or starts fucking up the rhythm.

9. Might not be a girl-exclusive thing but I personally need a lot more foreplay to actually enjoy sex. Most of the time I can’t get off from strictly penetration no matter how badly we both want it.

10. I suppose guys are warned about unexpected boners when they get sex ed, the same how girls are warned that discharge is normal as they’re going through puberty. I see a lot of discussion about said boners, I guess the girl secret would be just how frequent it was to go to the bathroom and suddenly your underwear was so soaked it was insane. (This is talking highschool/middleschool age, so careful with the replies lol). And it could dry on them and make em crusty, it could get bad enough that the underwear could get holes in them if they go long enough without being washed. Sorry for the grossness, tween girls can be unsanitary too

11. Some women have larger labias and sometimes they get stuck in our underwear. It’s VERY painful and extremely uncomfortable. And then we have to either walk funny to try to get them unstuck or walk very, very carefully to somewhere where we can just stick a hand down our pants to get things sorted. And don’t get me started about getting stuck in lace underwear!

12. The aftermath of shaving our lady parts is a two week long nightmare. After 3 days of smoothness we’re left with the world’s itchiest stubble rubbing up against panties, ingrown hairs from the constant pressure of yoga pants and skinny jeans, not to mention the fact that our va jay jay now feels like the face of a scruffy man.

13. When girls are particular about their hair products, it’s not us being overly superficial or picky. When your hair is long, the right shampoo/conditioner/drying routine can be the difference between soft waves and a dry, ratty mess.

14. Our favorite bra hasn’t been washed in 2 weeks.

15. At least in my experience, not a single girl I’ve ever interacted with has been turned on by an unsolicited dick pic.

16. We love it when you moan and make noises during sex. Don’t be the silent type, let me know I’m pleasing you god dammit!

17. Sometimes when we don’t want to have sex with you… it has nothing to do with you. We aren’t feeling sexy. We are feeling gross from menstruation or menopause. We have something troubling us. Maybe a yeast infection. Maybe i haven’t shaved or I fear my vag ain’t that fresh. And sometimes, I really do have a headache.

Don’t worry about it. If we have sat on that peen a few times and we always text/call you back…you’re golden.

18. If there are any men fashion designers on here women who like dresses want pockets in the dresses and I don’t mean near my boob I mean on the actual skirt part. I love my 1 dress with pockets.

19. Men with somewhat veiny forearms and pushed up sleeves are a godsend.

20. Sometimes a pubic hair gets stuck under a panty liner. Ouch.

21. Women’s bathrooms can be just as disgusting as men’s.

22. We get so turned on that our clit actually hurts sometimes.

23. We need to pee right after sex to reduce the risk of getting a UTI.

24. If you have a sense of humor and can make us giggle uncontrollably, you’re way more attractive than any muscular piece of man out there.

25. If you see me walking into the bathroom with a makeup bag, I’m not doing my makeup. I have my period and i hide my pads/tampons in the bag.

26. It’s quite common, like a quarter of women over 18 to pee when they don’t want to. Especially when sneezing, physical activity, laughing. Sneeze and squeeze! It’s more common in women who have had kids and when you’re overweight.

27. Girth vs length. I feel like guys always base each other off their length. I’ve had 9in skinny dick, wasn’t great. I’ve had a 5in [length] thick dick and it was a ride.

28. We are often secreting vaginal cleaning fluids. Sometimes guys are surprised when we’re wet with no foreplay, without realizing that it’s got nothing to do with how turned on we are and everything to do with our vag cleaning itself. These same guys automatically assume that we don’t need any foreplay because we’re already wet. Side note on these cleaning fluids: sometimes they’re acidic enough to bleach panties. That’s a normal occurrence and nothing to be concerned about.

29. Drunk girls in the bathroom are the nicest girls in the world.

30. Queefs are not “true” farts, in the sense of passing gas. They happen when air gets pushed up in there (often due to intercourse) and then it needs back out. Be nice if it happens cuz we might be embarrassed. And in a funny way, it’s sorta your fault?

31. “Heavy makeup” and “no makeup” looks mean something completely different than what you’re thinking.

32. Guys think girls are really complex but that’s not always the case. I mean sure, sometimes I have a lot going on in my head. But other times, when we’re in the car and I’m silent and you think I’m angry about something, I’m just thinking “I wish I’d ordered the tacos at dinner instead of the chicken,” or “did I remember to switch the laundry over? Damn.”

33. In pants hard bulge pic > actual pic of your dick.

34. I would say this only applies to women who are slightly bigger but this was an issue for me even when I was very slim: thigh rubbage is horrible when you wear a dress or skirt, particular in Summer!

It was also bad for me if I was wearing stockings and they would ride down a bit below my vag, essentially forcing the top of my thighs to rub together in inglorious harmony. It hurts!

35. Underboob sweat is a thing.

36. My nipples can be like two clitorises on my chest. Rubbing them very gently, licking, being kind = i get super wet and aroused. Usually when I masturbate I stimulate a nipple at the same time.

I don’t know why dudes don’t try this more when I ask. Most go at my chest like they want to smoosh my boobs like dough or suck a nipple like they’re angry and trying to lengthen it.

What I think they don’t get is there’s so much versatility in the body. I like rough play too but tender play is a whole other lovely world.

37. There’s a reason that periods also cause lots of pooping: “The lining of the uterus (endometrium) releases prostaglandins. These hormones help the uterus to contract during a period. Prostaglandins also help smooth muscles in the digestive tract to contract. This can lead to diarrhea and abdominal pain.”

38. Sometimes a hug will do a million times more good than trying to get me to explain why I’m upset, largely because I’m probably overwhelmed with my feelings and need to process them before I can explain them. The fastest way to process and get them out? A hug to feel loved.

39. How slowly we have to pull out a dry tampon in order not to rip our vagina tissue out.

40. Sometimes when we pee a stray drop or two starts to roll across our butt cheek or maybe that’s just me.

41. The true reason we go to the toilet together is…

…that the waiting queue would usually so long that alone we will a. get really bored and b. feel a little excluded from the conversation for some minutes when we come back to the group. So we go together and chat the whole time we are waiting.

42. Some women get blood clots in our periods and it feels like you’re giving birth so a jelly fish.

43. I think most girls appreciate emotional support in though situations more than advice, when I’m crying I don’t want my partner to tell me what I should do.

44. Periods suck overall but they are very different depending on the girl!

Some women get emotional, some are completely normal. some periods last for 8 days, some last for 3 days. some girls are in extreme pain, some just have mild discomfort. some flows are very heavy, some are very light.

Aka, “I’m on my period” can mean anything from “sorry, I’m completely incapacitated” or “I’m just feeling a little worse than usual.”

45. Some of us have to shave our toes.

46. Sometimes if you fart, it doesn’t escape through the fabric. Instead it rolls all the way from the back to the front with a noticeable little ‘pop’. It’s never a good feeling.

47. Every so often, something itches. Is it a yeast infection? Is it a bacterial infection? Is your pubic hair growing back in? Is it dryness? Is it irritation? Did something get stuck in your underwear?

The answer is that 99% of the time everything is fine but you’re still gonna worry and squirm uncomfortably trying to get it to stop.

(And also yeast infections in general: much more common thn one would think, and absolutely goddamn ruthless.)

48. Sometimes we have to take the “extra long stride” too, because period blood and discharge can make things sticky down there.

49. I don’t care how terrible it looks, if you make me a card or gift instead of buying one I will adore it forever.

50. “Is there anything on my butt” is code for “Has my period leaked?”