Heidi Priebe

15. Obsess yourself into a dark, dreary hole of self-loathing.

We all want resolutions as simple as purchasing a plane ticket, updating our “Current City” on Facebook and moving on with our lives, but we forget that our emotional ties run deeper than that.

Here’s to the damsels who pulled themselves out of distress and to the heroines who didn’t wait around to be saved.

We don’t need to show up now. Nothing happens in the real world anyway.

I’m texting you this because our generation has whittled interaction down into a series of superficial scripts that we exchange with one another on autopilot but I’m almost okay with the trivialities if they end up leading me to you.

“But then I’d have to put on real pants” is a legitimate excuse that you use to not do things.

It is never going to be your fault that you are not who someone else wishes you were.

This is me accepting that you’re leaving. It’s my acknowledgment that there’s no further argument to make, no angle left to take, no plea or bargain I could wager that could get you to change your mind and stay.

ISTJ – You were probably the hall monitor.

The friend or family member who is always “Just being realistic.”

In the life you don’t think you deserve, you belong somewhere.

They were your “someday” person – your lobster.

You’re attracting the kind of people you want to be around.

Stay where you are comfortable for so long that you no longer remember what it feels like to be challenged or to push your own limits.

You’ll know that someone loves you when they do not make excuses.

The part of your brain that remembers how to form coherent sentences just bails.

First of all, congratulations. You’re ahead of the game.

Move in together and subsequently stop hanging out with anybody except each other.