13 Artisans Explain How They Heal Themselves After A Heartbreak
By Heidi Priebe
Each of the Artisan personality types processes breakups a little differently – but there are undeniable similarities in the ways that ESTPs, ISTPs, ESFPs and ISFPs all grieve when they’re brokenhearted. Below, 13 Artisan personality types explain what they do to move on from a broken heart.
ESTP
“I wouldn’t recommend my process but it usually involves venting to my friends, getting drunk and crying. I also employ the ‘get over someone by getting under someone else’ method. Talking it out definitely helps the most but usually the only real way to heal is time”
“I jump into new relationship asap. Try to find a guy who can give me something the guy who broke my heart couldn’t give me. Getting whatever it is, comforts me, makes me feel valued and full of life again. Then I break up with whoever was the rebound guy and live on happily. Yes it sounds like a terrible thing to do, but there’s no other way. If I don’t jump into another relationship, I end up being stuck at home. If I don’t find a reason to go out and look beautiful, I get terribly depressed. One time it even led to suicidal thoughts. So finding a new guy ASAP is the only thing that helps. My only advice is, don’t open up your heart unless you feel truly secure and safe with your other half. For us to open up and let someone into our heart is very risky. If someone is in our heart, we’ll be willing to give out life for them. And when they betray, it’s impossible to except and realize what happened. It’s literally hell. So unless you KNOW they are will you forever (usually ISFJ’s are the most loyal partners for us, I’ve noticed) unless you KNOW, don’t open up.”
“I lose myself in fiction and vast amounts of distractions.”
ISTP
“I just need time alone to think.”
“I remind myself that this relationship is no longer real. The most important thing to do at first is to accept the breakup as real. Cut off all contact. Spend physical time away. Throw yourself into new experiences and catching up with your friends. Accept your feelings of grief mixed with love, but tell yourself that it is okay, because each time you feel pain, you are processing the old relationship as part of a negative past, one that you should no longer continue to avoid pain in the future. Comfort yourself knowing that if you accept the positives in your life and act like an awesome person, then some cool people will flock to you and love with your ex won’t feel necessary anymore. But whatever you do, don’t sit and do nothing while you’re in pain. Of course, you’ll know you’re over it when sitting and doing nothing doesn’t bring you deep sadness.”
“I don’t get heartbroken, i close myself off before I get too attached so it doesn’t happen.”
ESFPs
“I detach myself from my emotions mostly after crying it out and get back to normal. I heal myself mostly by indulging in my hobbies and confiding in close friends about how I feel because I know that they’re gonna assure me and make me feel better about myself. I guess I’ll tell them that it’s ok it’s just a phase and once they get past it they’ll be stronger than before and all that won’t matter that much anymore.”
“Go out with your friends. Meet new people. You thrive in social situations, at first it might feel forced, but soon enough you’ll start enjoying yourself again. You’ll get so distracted by all the new people and experiences that you’ll start to remember the world is a big place full of people and possibilities waiting to be discovered by you. The person who just broke your heart? They’ll start to look smaller and less significant in your rear view mirror as you move onto to new and better things.”
“I tried to be alone first, because I would cry non-stop (and I wouldn’t want people to see me like that). When I feel calmer, I’ll try to find my friends to talk about it and by then I’ll feel even better.”
“I default to lots of nonchalance and denial from the start, acting like it doesn’t matter to me at all when I’m out with my friends. However, in private, I’ll break down. But time heals everything, that’s true. Ultimately, be true to your own feelings. It’s ok to be hurt and it’s ok to talk about it.”
“Music. Wether it was sitting in a quiet room for a couple of hours a week, or out with friends at a new venue, music. As well as a road trip or two with a really close friend to rant too. After a few months, you learn its not the end of the world.”
“Ignore the problem until it’s really overwhelming. Drink or do something distracting. Then I need to talk though it with someone I trust. When things get hard deal with them when they are small instead when they are huge issues.”
ISFP
“I sleep and then look for new friends.”