When The One Who Cares Most Becomes The One Who Cares Least

I’ve always been the one who cares most. When you are the one who feels everything first, you become an open book. You’re the one who’s fully committed to the relationship since the very beginning. And it allows daydreaming a lot.

Being the one who cares less gives you power. It puts you a little aside from the relationship. You get a better view of it all. You’re committed to your partner but you’re also guard and realistic. You know pain and know that nothing last forever. It might also feel like you got the fate or destiny of the relationship on your hands. You start wondering why you don’t feel as light and happy as your partner.

You need space, and your partner needs to understand that your alone time and independence are important to you. It doesn’t mean that your relationship isn’t a priority, only that you’re careful. They say you should wait for the one who’ll be as involved as you. It will happen. Some of us just wear tough armor to protect our past. You’ve learned from our mistakes so you’re aware that someday, love will be gone. I think you become the one who cares less when you somehow force yourself into a relationship.

Being the one who cares most is like running around naked. You want to scream on every rooftop about how much you love that special someone. You draw little hearts in your agenda. Everything feels less stressful, and the sun gets warmer. You sleep better in his/her company. Yet, it’s both scary and thrilling to play that part: Your partner could crush you anytime and knows your weaknesses and it takes courage to show affection.

I’ve been on both sides. And being the one who cares most is the role I play better. Love is my fuel, the focal point of my life. Sometimes, it feels like I was born to love.

It is so easy to fall in love, but staying in love can be challenging. Love requires time: you don’t buy a relationship, you build one. It takes patience and respect and genuine feelings to share our deepest and darkest secrets with someone.

I am the one who cares most and I’ve been hurt several times. I healed but scars remain. And at some point it is more important to focus on the links between your special someone and yourself and forget that it might hurt. Pain and scars is only a reminder that you’ve healed and you’re still alive. Yes you’ll get crushed but it is part of learning what you deserve.

Being the one who cared most made me nervous at some point. My ex-boyfriend was craving to spend time with me while all I needed was my bubble. And I wondered if something was off with me. It felt wrong to push him away when all he was doing was showing me that he cared about me. In fact, I needed a break from love, because I had so many bad relationships and it felt like I wasn’t breathing right. I even asked if I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. I broke up with him.

Now, heading up to our six months anniversary, my boyfriend and I are starting to build a healthy and strong relationship. We are both committed. We are determined to make it work. And this time, we both play the “cares most” role.