I Am Not The Girl Who Will Be Your ‘Almost’

I am not going to be the girl you almost convince that a casual open relationship is okay. You don’t get to justify why you can’t commit and expect me to go along with it.

By

There comes a time when enough just has to be enough. A time when you stop accepting less than you deserve and you stand up for yourself. A time where you finally realize your heart can’t handle constantly being in the middle. So repeat it as many times as it takes until it finally sticks: “I am not the girl who will be your almost.”

I am not going to be the girl you almost commit to. I’m not the girl who one day you text back and the next you go radio silence. I’m not the girl who you pull back to you on a string when you feel me slipping away.

I am not the girl who will be your almost, because it isn’t something I deserve. The head games that go along with being someone’s almost leads to second guessing my own self-worth and convinces my heart to take less than it deserves.

I am not going to be the girl you almost meet halfway. You can’t expect me to put all of the time and effort into something you don’t actually want to work. It isn’t fair to either of us to spend any energy on an almost.

I am not going to be the girl you almost convince that a casual open relationship is okay. You don’t get to justify why you can’t commit and expect me to go along with it.

I’m not the girl that you don’t tell your family about or the girl who’s existence you try to hide.

I am not the girl who is going to be your almost, because I am the girl who is going to be someone’s partner.

I am the girl who knows that a real relationship takes hard work, open communication, and a certain level of understanding.

I am the girl who your friends and family are going to love. I’m the girl who doesn’t just learn their names—I take the time to genuinely get to know them. I’m the girl that you’re going to ask your friends advice about.

I am the girl who isn’t a play toy. I am the girl who respects boundaries, that wants you to still have your freedom but should never have to question where I stand with you.

I am the girl who will always try to meet you in the middle. I am also the girl who will pick up the slack when you’re having an off day. I’m the girl that you text after lunch because you miss me, not just at midnight when you’re lonely.

I am the girl who won’t ever make you worry if I’m being faithful. Casual relationships were ‘whatever’ when we were younger, but I’m looking for more than that.

I can’t be your almost because that goes against everything I’ve told myself I deserve.

There is a difference in taking your time getting to know someone so that you don’t rush into things and stringing someone along because you’re lonely.

So no, I am not the girl who will be your ‘almost.’ I’m either the girl you see a tomorrow with or I become a distant memory of yesterday, because I refuse to be stuck in the middle. Thought Catalog Logo Mark