• 20 Ways To Be Popular At An Expensive Liberal Arts School

    20 Ways To Be Popular At An Expensive Liberal Arts School

    Take over a building. Why not the library? All you need to do is show up and then refuse to leave. It is the most effective way of getting your point (perhaps justice in a far away land) across and in no way inconveniences other students. Make sure to bring your nalgene full of greentea…

  • I Have An Irrational Fear Of HIV

    I Have An Irrational Fear Of HIV

    I get tested every three months not because I need to, but because I have a sick fear that is obviously rooted in some other mental disturbance. HIV just gets to be its face.

  • Intervention: Erin Is Addicted To Meth, Men And Wearing Booty Shorts

    Intervention: Erin Is Addicted To Meth, Men And Wearing Booty Shorts

    Today Erin’s life is very ho-hum. Her husband Jim goes to work at a place called Christian World while she lounges in her bra and booty shorts, smokes meth and hangs out with her friends. When she tires of that, Erin invites her boyfriend over-the one who truly understands her-and the two have wild passionate…

  • Ten Best Celebrity Twitters

    Ten Best Celebrity Twitters

    When celebrities use Twitter, it can be a double-edged sword. On one hand, they’re able to create a faux personal relationship with their fans and enhance their brand and marketability. On the other, they could be complete idiots who shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near a computer to tweet their thoughts.

  • How to Live in New York City

    How to Live in New York City

    Go home for the holidays and run into old friends from high school. When you tell them that you live in New York, watch their eyes widen. They’ll say, “Oh my god, New York? That’s so crazy. I’m so jealous!” Have a blasé attitude about it but deep down inside, know they have good reason…

  • 5 Typical Acts of Politeness That are Inefficient and Should be Banned

    5 Typical Acts of Politeness That are Inefficient and Should be Banned

    What’s especially inefficient is when you stop for me on a busy two-lane road and I have to begin walking in front of you, only to realize that I have to wait for a number of cars going the other direction to pass. This situation can not by its nature have a positive outcome.