To The Girl Who’s Closed Herself Off

When I look around, I see people delicately navigating through life and dancing around each other with interactions polite enough to get them by but not deep enough to leave an impression. When I look around, I see a café bustling with energy and life, with different people talking about their days and the most recent hump slowing their lives down. When I look around, I see those who have been hurt before slowly opening up to those at the other end of the table, easing themselves out of their comfort zone and settling in.

But when I really look around, I see a timid girl tucked away in the corner, hoping to blend in behind the shield of noise and buzz of energy. She’s quiet enough to slip under the radar but deliberate enough to maintain her distance from any passerby.

To the girl who’s closed herself off because she’s given more than she’s been asked to, know that it’s okay to be quiet amidst the high-speed journey life can be. Know that it’s okay to feel burnt out, mentally and physically exhausted, drained and worn down from always always giving too much. It’s okay to take a backseat approach for your inner wellbeing and recollect in a quieter and more mindful atmosphere. When things get too noisy in your mind and there is too much clutter for you to think clearly, the first thing to do is to take some time off so you can recenter your gravity.

Know that life will continuously move at high speeds, but you don’t need to always match its pace. Know that it’s okay to step out of its revolving doors, slow down, take a breather and reflect inwards. Sometimes you need to close yourself off to the world around you to realize how deep your wounds are in order for them to heal. Sometimes we need to neglect those wounds so that the cells have time to learn how to regenerate, because the more you rip it apart when it’s still tender and bruised, the harder it will be to recover and the uglier the scar will be.

To the girl who’s closed herself off, why should you care about what others think of you in this moment in time? This is your most crucial moment of serenity before metamorphosis, the anticipation bubbling up inside you before erupting like colorful fireworks in the sky. Even the best and most beautiful things in the world needs to retreat and rest in order to recuperate its strengths so that they can find the floor beneath their feet again. Know that closing yourself off doesn’t necessarily mean cutting ties, it doesn’t mean severing your emotions with the world, and it most certainly doesn’t mean creating an empty shell for you to retreat into.

It means protecting that heart that you wear so openly. It means thinking twice before offering a helping hand if it means carrying a burden that is too much for you to bear. It means being able to say no without feeling guilt or regret. It means being able to put your alone time before giving your time out to others, because the more you exhaust and burn yourself out socially, the bigger the mountain you have to climb in restoring your inner peace and equilibrium. It means taking the time out to not have to reply to messages instantly if the idea of maintaining amicable connections via social media burns you out. It means knowing and understanding that all those who care about your world will wait with open arms when you make your comeback stronger than ever, and will do so only when the time is right. It means knowing to separate your universe with the solar system when the orbit of your planet is out of control begins revolving around and around without a sense of purpose or direction. It means knowing that even comets can collide and obliterate everything into destructive stardust.

To the girl who’s closed herself off – take this time to restore the chaos within you. Know that when the time is right, you will evolve and return to the world bigger, better, and stronger. A woman who has taken the time out for herself is one that has known the challenges of self-love and self-care amidst the whirlwind of life.