What Kind Of Frenemy She Is, Based On Her Zodiac Sign

Aries:

The ram is your highly energetic, can-do attitude coach, I mean, friend. She’ll write up your meal plans and get you up in the am for that dreaded run. Don’t be fooled though, there is no doubt in her mind who holds first place. Don’t blame these trailblazers, they were the first ones to pop out of the proverbial zodiacal womb. They’re designed to compete, so if she’s a little extra, don’t take it personally.

Taurus:

Got a dilemma, call up your trusted bull. These earthly creatures were made to protect and sooth. Value their solid advice but also be prepared to face their incoming judgment shall you not follow it. They may or may not show it, but rest assured that they always “know better”. Take them to dinner and they’ll likely soften up after a few bites.

Gemini:

She’s probably your funniest friend, right? You know who I’m talking about, the girl who can make light out of anything and is super fun to take to a party. Only she might  leave without you. Accidentally, of course. Or she might make new besties and ignore you the whole night. Again, totally not intended. It’s hard being such an adorable airhead.

Cancer:

She’s so sweet, caring, affectionate …, and then boom, she’s moody moody moody. She’s soft, nurturing and kind, and then, she’s retreated in her shell because of something you said that “really hurt”.  Sensitivity, which is what makes this friend  so easy to relate to, it’s also what can make her equally erratic should she feel wounded.

Virgo:

This is the type who would love to plan your wedding. She’s about getting shiz done. She’s reliable to a fault. She’s also a worrywart, because in her world it’s all about perfection. Whether it’s her eyebrows or your life, it can always be better. Life is messy though, so expect her complain. A lot. If you don’t entertain her nagging, she’ll probably think you’re a bad friend and stop organizing your parties. And then also point out that your outfits never matched.

Leo:

You love her, because she loves herself. So much. It’s like confidence through osmosis when you’re around this exuberant friend. Until you forget to compliment her new hairdo, blog or iPhone case. Her mane requires stroking, so make sure you’ve charged up your batteries.  Because even though she’ll have your back no matter what, this is no low maintenance affair.

Libra:

She can always see your point. Ah the diplomat, you could never be! She’s practically liked by all your other friends, but she rarely picks up the phone and flakes so much you’ve given up on trying to make plans. This friend has legit confusion on the brain, and while her intentions are to be fair she might do what is easiest at times rather what is “right”. She hates disappointing you, so she’ll also sweeten up her stories to avoid any confrontation.

Scorpio:

This gal is ride or die, until she thinks YOU need to die.  While sensitive like your cancerian friend, this venomous one is also fiercely honest and takes no hostages. If she loves you she’ll be extremely possessive and can go to great lengths to avoid losing you. I don’t care if you’re stranded in the middle of the Sahara, do not txt her boyfriend. If she thinks you’ve “betrayed her”, well, just have 911 on speed dial. Maybe change your name too.

Sagittarius:

She’s a loud one. She also pulls off the best smokey eye on the block. As legit explorer of the group, she will drop it all for a weekend getaway to Bali for the heck of it. She might also decide to get married while there and never come back. If you dare point out that you know, “Jessica, that’s a little crazy?” she’ll laugh in your face and pat you on the head like a pet squirrely. She likes to go big or go home, and whether you agree or not, she’s fine moving on without you.

Capricorn:

This friend is your stable, reliable, also at times unexpectedly quirky seagoat. She can be so serious, it’s kinda funny. You admire her cool exterior and perseverance. And yet, she can be a tad cold. You might be childhood friends and never have seen her cry. This control loving specimen might… just jab a horn in your back if she feels you’re after her corner office.

Aquarius:

You love your Aquarius friend because frankly you don’t know your Aquarius friend! One day they’re vegan, the next they’re eating brisket tacos. Anything goes, gosh they’re so cool. Their unclinginess is also awesome and so are their cutting edge ideas, until the day they joke about ghosting you and then actually do.

Pisces:

Finally, your dreamy, henna loving, self-sacrificing Pisces; she’ll give you the hoodie off her back, and lend you that $156 to pay your speeding ticket. Thing with the fish is….. she has no boundaries. She might be able to give you the world without realizing how fucking crazy that actually is. Having a logical conversation is another hurdle as common sense is no match for the turbulent waves of their emotions.