15 Things That Will Happen If Lebron James Signs With The Cavs

1. Chris Bosh will leave Miami and take the max salary contract with the Houston Rockets.

2. Ticket sales in Miami will drastically decrease since Josh McRoberts and Toney Douglas don’t really sell the number of jerseys of Lebron James.

3. The Cleveland economy will vastly improve with the return of their hometown hero.

4. On Lebron’s first day with the team fans will flock to the arena in huge numbers to try to catch a glimpse of their superstar.

5. So many people will be gathered in one spot, the ground will begin to crumble beneath them.

6. The earth will give way under their weight and a massive opening will appear, growing larger each day.

7. Smoke will begin to rise from the opening and flames will begin to flicker out of it.

8. The Beast described in the book of Revelation will emerge with his unholy minions and will begin to wage war on humanity.

9. The Four Horsemen on the Apocalypse will ride down from the clouds on their mighty steeds and attempt to fight off the demonic hoard.

10. The battle will seem all but over, until something happens that will turn the tides forever.

11. Macho Man Randy Savage will descend from the heavens dropping an elbow onto the Beast that renders it unconscious.

12. Children will begin to cast roses at the feet of the Macho Man, but he didn’t do it for the glory. Macho Man does it because that’s who he is.

13. Macho Man will soar back into the clouds and slowly we will rebuild our society. So much damage was done, but as humanity joins together, we see signs of new life.

14. After years of work we build back what the world used to be. It’s not a utopia, but we are grateful for the things we have and that we’ve survived.

15. Also Cleveland will be favorited to win the Eastern Conference title.