6 Things That Happen When You’re Too Scared To Flirt

The other person doesn't realize you exist.

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1. The other person doesn’t realize you exist. You don’t want to freak them out by liking too many of their photos or staring at them for too long or initiating a conversation, so you stay out of their way. You don’t talk to them at all. You barely acknowledge their existence. Meanwhile, they have absolutely no idea that you’re interested because you haven’t been sending out any signals. If anything, they probably think you can’t stand them because you keep your distance. There’s no way for them to tell what’s really running through your mind, which is why it’s much better to be honest from the start.

2. You rely on your friends to tell you what to do. Before you send a text to your crush, you send screenshots to your friends in order to get their opinions about what you should say. You don’t want to look stupid, so you overthink the basics. But you don’t want your friends to be talking to your crush for you. You want to develop your own personal relationship with them. Remember, if you can’t be yourself around them, they aren’t right for you.

3. You put the other person on a pedestal. The reason you’re so terrified to talk to your crush is because you think they’re out of your league. You think they can do better. You think they’re some perfect person — but they’re not. They’re only human. They have flaws. They have insecurities. They are more like you than you realize. You need to stop acting like they’re above you and recognize that you’re both human beings trying to do the best that you can. There’s no reason to feel intimidated.

4. You slowly but surely watch everyone you’re interested in date someone else. If you wait too long, your crushes are eventually going to get into relationships. They are eventually going to find love elsewhere. You need to shoot your shot while you have the chance. Otherwise, you’re going to miss out on someone special. They’re not going to stay single forever. Someone else is going to see their beauty, too.

5. You do most of your flirting online. Talking to your crush over social media or commenting on their posts is a great first step — but it shouldn’t be your only step. You need to move your flirting from the internet to real life. You need to meet up with this person face-to-face and develop an even stronger connection. Otherwise, it’ll just be another almost relationship that ends before it begins.

6. You miss out on relationships — and regret it. The thought of getting rejected is scary. But it’s even scarier to risk missing out on an amazing relationship, simply because you’re too nervous to escape your comfort zone. If you want to date someone, you need to put yourself out there. You need to be brave. You need to stop caring about whether or not you get turned down, because if you keep to yourself, you’re never going to get into a relationship. You’re never going to know what would’ve happened if you were more honest with yourself. Thought Catalog Logo Mark


About the author

January Nelson

January Nelson

January Nelson is a writer, editor, and dreamer. She writes about astrology, games, love, relationships, and entertainment. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University.