This Is The Problem With Settling For A Life That Doesn’t Excite You
Given the many distractions that compete for our attention these days, it’s not surprising people don’t devote more time to what truly inspires them.
By Tony Fahkry
Given the many distractions that compete for our attention these days, it’s not surprising people don’t devote more time to what truly inspires them. We have a habit of tuning out anything that is not urgent.
There was a time when a person was only contactable via a phone landline, with no answering machine.
Nowadays, I can reach you through email, text messaging, instant messaging, social media, and dare I say, call you on your mobile device. Yet, this has not improved our lives other than make us more available.
Being more available equates to having less time to focus on your priorities.
As a consequence, we say ‘yes’ to things that don’t inspire us, but provide a sense of satisfaction of having undertaken the task.
What I’m proposing is that you adopt a hell yeah attitude towards tasks instead of, it will do for now.
The idea was first discussed by the American entrepreneur Derek Sivers. He outlined how he prefers to engage in pursuits he is passionate about, instead of those he’s obligated to do.
“As we become more mature and enlightened adults, we come to realize that if an opportunity is presented to us and it does not gain a near 100-percent enthusiasm and commitment from us, then the reply must be a 100-percent no,” affirms motivational author Brendon Burchard in his book The Motivation Manifesto.
What if you were to adopt a similar approach?
You may avoid doing so because saying ‘no’ to good enough projects, goals or relationships suffices to keep you motivated for the time being.
It’s an idea I refer to as being Parked in my book The Power To Navigate Life: Your Journey To Freedom.
My contention is that we are Navigating Life, pursuing that which resonates with our deepest self or we’re stagnant, not making real progress – hence a Parked state.
The idea came from a book on relationships, where the author suggested men have a tendency to stay Parked in intimate relationships, more so than women. They are content to stay in the relationship instead of missing out on intimacy and company.
When you settle, you compromise your self-worth because you accept less than meaningful conditions. The basis is to move from being Parked to an mindset of hell yeah in everything you do.
Consider author Larry Weidel’s perspective in Serial Winner: 5 Actions to Create Your Cycle of Success: “Winners know that if you don’t figure out what you want, you’ll get whatever life hands you.”
Time Is A Precious Commodity
“You have to be burning with an idea, or a problem, or a wrong that you want to right. If you’re not passionate enough from the start, you’ll never stick it out.” — Steve Jobs
When you say ‘no’ to requests that are low priorities, you free up time to say ‘yes’ to areas that serve your highest good.
By embracing a hell yeah attitude, you focus attention on what really matters.
It’s vital to explore your full potential because in those moments you experience deep flow states and awaken your greatest ability.
You may undertake meaningless tasks or commit to relationships that don’t inspire you because you’re fearful more opportunities will not show up later. So, you take what is available now, hoping it will occupy your time until something better comes along.
It’s what you devote your time and attention to, that matters.
Time is a precious commodity which many people squander. Guard it with your life and choose opportunities that inspire you, rather than just being task-orientated.
“Position your daily actions so time is working for instead of against you. Because time will either promote you or expose you,” writes author Jeff Olson in The Slight Edge: Secret to a Successful Life.
Don’t think you can get everything done because it’s impossible. You are likely to wash over the activities without fully committing to the task.
The question arises, how will you know whether to undertake a project or say ‘no’?
It’s as simple as this: if you don’t feel a spark of enthusiasm, it’s unlikely you’ll see it through to completion.
It is my experience, if something is difficult at the start and I’m lacking motivation, the idea will not succeed because I’m not bringing my whole self to it.
If you cannot say hell yeah, it’s best say ‘no’.
I assure you, adopting this frame of mind will yield success and you needn’t buy into the fear more opportunities won’t become available. In fact, more quality prospects will emerge since you are careful what you give your attention to.
You should say ‘yes’ to tasks that excite you, that you are passionate about and to which you’re likely to bring your best work.
Manage Your Time
“A person can succeed at almost anything for which they have unlimited enthusiasm.” — Charles M. Schwab
“Pareto points us in a very clear direction: the majority of what you want will come from the minority of what you do. Extraordinary results are disproportionately created by fewer actions than most realize,” affirm authors Gary Keller and Jay Papasan in The One Thing: The Surprisingly Simple Truth Behind Extraordinary Results.
There is little room for negotiation and no grey area when you pursue a hell yeah way of life. You commit to the task or relationship or not at all, in which case you walk away. Similarly, it pays to know which areas you are saying hell yeah to. It may pose a challenge to apply this approach to every facet of life because of competing interests.
For example, your partner may want to visit his/her favourite restaurant and you don’t feel the same way. In this scenario, diplomacy prevails to maintain a healthy relationship.
Embracing a hell yeah outlook will change your approach to life, in so far as developing a laser-like focus while managing your time. You concentrate your attention on high value areas that lead to happiness and fulfilment, with a better chance of success.
Authors Gary Keller and Jay Papasan remind us once again to choose what you give your attention to: “To achieve an extraordinary result you must choose what matters most and give it all the time it demands. This requires getting extremely out of balance in relation to all other work issues…”
Given the many events that compete for your attention, it’s important to be discerning with your time.
You become inspired by your goals and projects, instead of expecting a situation will improve as you go along — it seldom does.
Larry Weidel reminds us to maintain our enthusiasm or risk it burning out: “When it comes to most of our ideas, our enthusiasm has a shelf life. We won’t be inspired to go for it forever. If you can’t decide what you’re going to do with your energy and drive, it will peter out. Doubt will grow and overwhelm you.”
Commit to life with passion and fervour, otherwise you will be pulled along by secondary tasks that are less desirable.
Life is too short and valuable to be pursuing goals that are not consistent with your greater self.