10 Reasons Why Female Masturbation Is The Greatest Thing, Ever

1. It is an expression of self-love and, thusly, the best way to learn to love yourself. Masturbation forces us to acknowledge those parts of our bodies that we would otherwise never so much as even look at. Beyond genital stimulation, masturbation is also the stimulation of the eroticism contained within our bodies — for some it is the touch to a collarbone, the brushing of a nipple or the stroking of thighs that brings us closer to orgasm than genital play alone. To be able to come, to excite our bodies and to be excited by it, is to no longer be repulsed by it but rather it is to love it undeniably.

2. Never have I met a woman who has not been in the highest of spirits after masturbating. Anger, frustration, depression and boredom have all been relieved with the help of my index, middle and ring fingers, usually in pairs and at times in threes. If you cannot afford a therapist, masturbate; it is good for the soul.

3. Women can come from clitoral stimulation alone, without the aid of penetration. This is empowering.

4. There are many women who find great difficulty in reaching an orgasm with a partner, and there are even more who have never experienced an orgasm. Often they are also the women who never masturbate or seldom do. Because all women are not the same and because there is no one specific way to achieve an orgasm, masturbation allows a woman to determine what she likes and dislikes and what makes her come. She becomes so well-versed in her own body that sex with a partner is no longer a stressful recurrence of fake orgasms, but instead it is an actual pleasurable experience.

5. That is, masturbation is the greatest form of self-discovery.

6. But also, masturbating is the end of the fake orgasm.

7. Masturbating equips a woman with a greater sense of confidence because she knows exactly what turns her on and what makes her come. It makes a woman feel in control of her body and can, without reserve, direct a partner to do what makes her feel good.

8. Masturbating allows a woman to understand that sex is about her as well.

9. Eat, Pray, Love would have been infinitely better and perhaps even enjoyable had it been about the protagonist on a spiritual-awakening journey through her vagina to “find herself” from the comfort of her own bed, as opposed to having some man awaken her spirit for her.

10. It is the greatest act of feminism.