Tarrin Andrews

As she’s about to dive in he gives a half-hearted, “Wait a minute!” but it’s too late. She climbs out of the lake and he says, “That’s not Lake Minnetonka,” and GETS ON HIS MOTORCYCLE AND RIDES AWAY.

The bat signal group text.

The “Should we check a bag?” conversation.

Right before they board a long flight. LA to New York? What better way to have them reflect in relative isolation than on a plane filled with strangers and no internet access for 5-6 hours?

A few movies that won’t leave him in agony for 90 minutes.

Don’t blame her behavior on her period.

“There’s no sexy way to help a girl take her pants off.”

Getting over someone is one of life’s great challenges. No matter how many times you do it, it’s going to suck — even if they were horrible to you.

Back when I was 19 or so and had just gotten off of work, a couple of Australians, a Brit, and a German at my bus stop wanted directions to Hooters, which I gave them.

Some people say fear is learned but that’s bullshit. You’re born with it. It’s in your blood, it’s thick in mine.

Since you were a child (or a younger one), everyone’s been telling you the many benefits of volunteering for any number of organizations.

The Kanye you don’t hear about is, of course, the Kanye you don’t see.