8 Things You Don’t Have To Accept About Your Boyfriend

It may be hard to distinguish the line between being shy with public affection, and being downright cold.

By

Ángelo González
Flickr / Ángelo González

His Hygiene

There is a fine line between accepting that your boyfriend is a grown man who still thinks it is chic to shop at Aeropostale, and accepting that he  refuses to comb his hair or bathe once a day. Boyfriends, at times, need guidance when it comes to hygiene. You shouldn’t have to put up with stinky pits and unwashed shirts no matter how adorable he might be.  If they’re a grown person, they should treat their bodies as such.

His Laziness

Everyone needs a few days where they do nothing but sit on the couch, eat Doritos, and watch Judge Judy. However, if you’re a driven person and your boyfriend’s only aspiration in life is how long he can scratch his balls before anyone notices, you don’t need to put up with that. Your boyfriend could be doing anything his little heart desires as long as it is something other than snacking and existing. If your boyfriend is starting to feel more like you’re dragging along a sack of meat behind you than an actual partner, then it is time to cut him free.

How He Treats Strangers

If your boyfriend is rude to people in the food-service industry, not only should that be a giant red flag that he has the capacity to be a major rude boy down the road but you should be really embarrassed. One of the staples of being a decent human being is kind to the people who make close to minimum wage to dote on the demanding public.

If He Is Racist, Homophobic, Transphobic etc.

This could easily have been coupled with the point above, however it is important for me to drive home just how unattractive this is. If you’re an open minded person and your boyfriend makes, “faggot,” comments when he sees two men holding hands in public or on television, you need to decide just how important is it for you to shut that shit down. Not only do you have the conscious choice to slap him down like the hand of whatever higher power you believe in (that includes Beyoncé), but you also have the choice to help educate him as to why it is not adorable in any way to be ignorant.

How He Acts Around His Friends

There is an important distinction I would like to make here: you must accept your boyfriend’s friends…you don’t have to accept how he acts around them. If your boyfriend is a gentleman to you whenever he is not around his crew, but tokes up and is rude when he is surrounded by his buddies, that is a huge hell no. Why is he fine to have one glass of wine with dinner when it’s just you two but feels the need to blackout every time he is around his best friend? Men who are completely different people around there friends deeply unhinge me. Who are you trying to fool, buddy?

Bedroom Etiquette

If your boyfriend is only concerned with his pleasure and as soon as he cums he rolls over and falls asleep, that is unacceptable. Sex should be the safe space between the both of you where each party involved leaves satisfied in some way. If your man isn’t willing to meet you half way, play, “Its Not Fair,” by Lily Allen and kick his ass to the curb. It’s important to note that although sex isn’t the most important aspect of a relationship, anyone who says it is not a huge factor is lying.

The Type Of Love He Is Willing To Offer

It may be hard to distinguish the line between being shy with public affection, and being downright cold. If your boyfriend is constantly ignoring you or making you feel as if you aren’t special in any way to him, it may be time to move on. If you’re completely unsatisfied with the way your boyfriend shows that he cares (or tries to remind you that he doesn’t) that that is not something you need to endure. The sooner you understand the little things that a boyfriend will do to show you he cares, like prepare the pot of coffee the night before so that it will be ready when you wake up, it will be easy to distinguish when he is being distant on purpose.

His Views On Monogamy

If what you’re deeply after is someone who wants to have sex with only you, yet your boyfriend thinks that it is okay to have flings on the side or sext the night away, then you will find yourself deeply unhappy in your relationship. I’m not saying that monogamy is the only way couples can be happier together. What I mean is, you need to come to a mutual agreement on what monogamy will entail in the framework of your relationship. If he refuses to follow the rules you both agree on, then he isn’t the fella for you.

Bonus

If he wears AXE because fuck no. Buy him a new scent immediately. Thought Catalog Logo Mark


About the author

Shawn Binder

eBook ‘Everything Is Embarrassing’ out in 2014.