Stop Obstructing My Social Media With Your Political Opinions!

I have felt very strongly about this topic since my little clueless self in 8th grade read her first MSNBC article. As a Political Science major and someone who has been very into the “industry” since daddy’s first government job required him to stay close to DC, I find it utterly obnoxious when uneducated people incessantly plaster their loud political opinions all over my social media.

Now, being the political activist I am, I will occasionally tweet about the silly rules of the Senate or link to the National Popcorn Board (yes, it exists—popcorn.org) on Facebook. I love posting trivial things that Congress does and I’ll occasionally joke about an issue such as the Scottish referendum just to bring awareness. I make my posts short, sweet, and to the point. Oh, and I have to make them funny.

Lately I’ve been seeing tweets directed at the government made by high-school girls. These children have been bitching and whining about how Congress does nothing and how our legislature is so messed up. Nothing grinds my gears more than when a non-taxpaying teenager living under the roof of their upper-middle class pseudo-mansion in the wealthy suburbs criticizes the nation for doing their best to make the people happy.

I admit it! I’m one of those teenagers who can’t say crap about oppression! I live a decently awesome life in a school located where people wish they could vacation. I spend my breaks in DC suburbia tucked into Anthropologie bedding live-streaming C-SPAN in my designer loungewear sipping on my tea imported from China. (Side note: Chinese green tea is leaps and bounds better than American green tea. Fact.) Maybe I’m being a hypocrite writing about how I hate when undereducated people sloppily spread their opinions all over the Internet. But please, can somebody just back me up when I say that a sophomore in high school should not make thirty-plus feminism posts a day?

Great! You’re a feminist! So am I! Wow, we have so much in common! Only difference is I’m currently attending a Top 50 university to learn about the progression of gender studies and you’re struggling to keep your passing grade in regular chem. Stick to what you do best, dear: Keep tweeting about that delicious pumpkin spice latte.

I agree that society needs so stop over-sexualizing fifteen-year-olds. But that’s just it: You’re fifteen. You’re just bringing people down with your posts. Stop killin’ my mood, yo. I promise that when you vote me into Congress I will do my best to help you. For now, go back to your honors pre-calculus homework and leave it to the professionals.