10 New Ridiculous Emoticons To Take Your Texting Game To The Next Level

I, like most terrible people, use emojis all the time. I’ve used them sarcastically so much that I now find myself using them in everyday text conversations. I’ve become a real monster. While emojis are easy, some of us are purists in the text game and prefer good old fashioned emoticons. For those of you who aren’t ashamed of your life and don’t know the difference, let me explain through my sadness. An emoji is a tiny little picture you choose from a list, while an emoticon is a series of letters, numbers, or symbols that look like this :)  ;)

To help you stay on top of the emoticon world, I came up with some new ones you can use on your friends. Some of them are for very specific situations so they’ll either be very impressed or extremely creeped out with your readiness.

Let’s watch the part in My Girl when Thomas J loses his glasses:

B-) – B = :-(

I could see your mouth moving during your ventriloquist act:

:Y

Remember “Doug” on Nickelodeon:

(^:E

Please send help because there are giant spiders coming to eat me:

^^..^^  >-|-o   ^^..^^

Who’s your favorite character on “The Simpsons”? Mine is Marge:

XXXX:-)

Thanks for bandaging up my head when I fell off the moving sidewalk at the airport. I’m feeling much better now:

#:-)

One of my pop tarts had the normal amount of frosting, but the other one had none whatsoever:

[8] [ ] ????

Wouldn’t it have been funny if Dr. Frankenstein put giant boobs on his monster Lol:

E:-|-8-<

Omg how have you not seen Gravity:

C-|-<   ~~~~~     EI====>

Can you please help out? A bad guy from a movie in the 1930s tied me to the railroad tracks:

HHH o-I< HHH