Richard Grayson

Avis must be getting ready to board her jet in Montreal now. I admire her courage, going off alone to a totally new and different life in Europe.

Ronna looked really pretty and proud: my girlfriend the college graduate. And tonight, when she appeared on the Channel 2 Six O’Clock News, she looked stunningly beautiful.

Coming home last night at dusk, I was suffused with a pale blue bittersweet kind of emotion. My last class at Richmond College was over, and I felt ecstatic and nostalgic at the same time.

The last time I saw Peter, at Kjell’s house four years ago, I was really attracted to him, and Ronna, who had him as a drama counselor in the country, thinks he might be gay, too.

I wonder if I sound pompous in these pages, like some self-centered, self-righteous neurotic who can’t see his faults – for there are many traits in me that I do not like. I can be as petty, mean and destructive as anybody.

Ronna said she doesn’t believe anything anyone tells her while they’re on top of her, and I guess I do say “I love you” more when I’m breathing heavily.

I’m beginning to wonder if I shouldn’t finally try a homosexual experience just to test things out. Maybe it would be more satisfying than being with a woman.

There’s so much to do in life, and I don’t want to regret anything.

Finally, I went over to her house and she came downstairs wearing a pretty dress. She had spent the whole afternoon trying to look nice, and there I was, selfishly spoiling her evening.

Girls are judged by their looks and they’re treated as oddballs if they don’t marry and go for a career instead. Being a girl certainly isn’t as good as I thought. And I definitely am happy having a penis rather than a vagina.

Everyone’s talking about the latest fad, called “streaking”: male college students running around the campus wearing nothing but shoes. Ronna said the first streaker appeared on the BC quadrangle Monday.

Certain people, like Renee or Teresa, send out nonverbal radar signals to others, saying “I’m shit – step all over me,” and then they get a series of guys who are bastards. Then there are girls, like Alice or Ronna, who wouldn’t stand for that type of treatment.

In bed, Ronna was at once warm and gentle, furiously passionate, protective and yet a bit vulnerable herself. Her shyness seems to have melted away.

While I want to be free to explore relationships, sexual or otherwise, with other girls, it doesn’t take away anything from my basic, enduring attachment to Ronna.

Both Kenny and Barbara seem utterly without pretensions and totally free to say whatever pops into their minds. Although I don’t know them that well, I just feel happy when I see them.

Avis admits that she’s never gotten herself into such a mess, being sexually involved with twin brothers.

Called “Annie” and based on the Little Orphan Annie comic strip, the play sounds like it will be a resounding flop on Broadway. Too bad Dad says he may have to invest something in it because of his friendships with Lennie and George.

We were so open, the sex just had to be good, because there was such real feeling behind it. After our orgasms, we lay close to each other, touching and talking, until 4 AM.