Raul Felix

While it’s great to be proud of one’s service, it’s also the mark of a huge tool bag if he is unable to talk about anything but his time in the belly of the beast.

You never know if she will be a footnote in your heart or have her own book.

Your friends are proud of you and tell you to make it back alive, or they’ll kill you.

Carrie Nation, a name both feared and mocked by drunken lowlifes of yore.

Well, it’s not gay because you weren’t attracted to her masculine features.

He doesn’t let the fact that he is without education, power, money, or influence become roadblocks. Tony uses the tools he has—balls, decisiveness, and street smarts—to help him overcome every obstacle.

You’re here to enjoy a long night of heavy drinking and poor decisions. Ever since you’ve all become pseudo-adults, it seems to have been impossible to get all of you together.

I love the fact that I am able to talk about the most cruel and demented subjects that come to mind while at work.

The Jack Off Line is a litmus test where a male has to ask himself one simple question: “Would I rather jack off than hook up with this girl?

You’d think there’d be fewer clueless people with the Internet and all, but there are still plenty of wide-eyed innocents, many of whom end up ripped off but with a few interesting stories to tell the folks when they go back to working at the Cheesecake Factory.

You set off on a journey to fulfill your dreams because you’re a fucking Billy Badass and nothing is going to stand in your way.

From behind I noticed her hot pink dress, which ends barely low enough to cover up her firm, well-shaped ass. Her blonde hair is wild like that of an 80’s glam-rock video whore.