14 Self-Sabotaging Traps That Are Holding You Back From Shining
1. Not looking directly in someone’s eyes when you are talking to them. Eye contact is crucial to getting your point across and understanding the other person. It also makes the communication so much stronger and more credible.
2. Hesitating to speak-up in large groups. Practice makes perfect. If you have something to say and you are confident about it, you should say it whether you are in a small or large group. Over time, you will find yourself more comfortable in larger groups.
3. Not asking for what you really want. The only way for us to get what we want is to ask for it! Sometimes we have to be bold enough to just ask and see what happens.
4. Thinking that embarrassing situations will repeat themselves. We need to get rid of this mental trap that often makes us fear new situations or challenges that mirror a previous situation we were not very fond of because we think we will embarrass ourselves again.
5. Fear of rejection. If we don’t try, we will never know. Mentally strong and successful people do not let their fear of rejection stop them from trying. They just take the plunge over and over again.
6. Negative body language. Crossing your arms, not sitting up straight, not smiling, or looking at you phone the whole time gives the impression that you are bored and not present.
7. Waiting for the approvals of others to act. If you keep waiting for people to validate your decision to feel better about it, you will never really be spontaneous or daring. Sometimes it’s just better to go with your gut and take assertive actions.
8. Making excuses instead of finding solutions. We often take the easy way out and make excuses instead of trying to find ways to change our situation. Changing what is bothering us, even if it is hard, will enrich our lives in so many ways.
9. Not knowing how to say no. We can overwhelm ourselves when we say yes to everything we can or cannot do. Managing our time and our priorities and understanding our limitations will help us make more concrete decisions.
10. Being afraid of asking questions. The only way to learn is to ask questions, especially when you are still trying to understand something. Asking the right questions now will save you from asking more questions later.
11. Paying more attention to your physical appearance than your qualities. If all you think about when you are around people is the pimple on your forehead or your messy hair or your puffy eyes, you take away from what really matters-your personality. A lot of highly charismatic people are not physically attractive but they know how to embrace their imperfections.
12. Lowering your voice when you speak. Sometimes you need to make a loud and clear statement for people to really hear it and grasp its importance. Your voice can be a powerful tool when sending certain messages across-use it!
13. Agreeing with something that offends you because you don’t want to argue. Completely ignoring your own values, needs, and standards will hold you back in everything in your life. Have the confidence to defend what you truly believe in.
14. Waiting to be told what to do. Successful people know that in order to achieve success they sometimes have to take a leap of faith. Constantly waiting to be told what to do will not push you to demonstrate your real potential and shine like you are meant to. 
