Penelope Trunk

Look, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking summer internships are over…

I tell myself I have that burn on my thigh. Or the scar on my eyebrow, or the nail in my heart. Whatever it is. That’s why I tell myself I don’t have to function like a normal person.

You have your whole life to get a career. This is not true about having a baby.

It’s simple, proven advice, but few people take it because they think they are unique and their experience in a career will be different.

If you’re looking for a life changing, spiritually moving experience, how about therapy?

Do you know what a loser is today? A loser is someone who doesn’t take the time to get to know herself. A loser is someone who saw his parents earn a lot of money and not get happiness from it and still deludes himself that money will make him happy.

It’s hard to find the right path, but the good news is that you don’t need to be on the right path, you just need to be on any path.

One of the worst pieces of career advice that I bet each of you has not only gotten but given is to “do what you love.” Forget that. It’s absurd.

There are actually only two choices: be a breadwinner or marry a breadwinner.

You are out of step socially in terms of grooming or sex.

Get plastic surgery.