My Only Dreams Are Nightmares Now That You’re Gone

Eyes fluttering, another dream or nightmare playing in your head, ways to get out of locked mazes, melodies that draw you towards the abyss filled with black water, melodies from your childhood like sirens calling you towards a bad fate,

you’ll meet rotten people, you’ll meet the loves of your life, everyone will leave you without goodbyes, you’ll curse them out, you’ll curse everything you ever touched, everything that ever touched you, you’ll still hear the melodies but though they turn like a knife inside you, you don’t follow them anymore,

happiness or pain, you want none of them, you live like you’re dead, you die like you’ve never lived, it’s all the same, everything mixes into one, everything disappears, everything changes, one by one, two by two,

you continue to stay inside your shell, waiting around for the silence to engulf your body and soul, other people aren’t going to follow you wherever you want to go, but it won’t matter, you have to walk alone so you can walk faster than others, you never needed other people that much anyway, they’re so fragile, they want so many answers, but you’re always only filled with questions,

Everyone feels like they’re made of glass, while you’re made of iron, you withstand the pressure of life, but they walk over shards of their own being, so painful to watch, looking for answers with blood on the soles of their feet, where do they wish to go?

Maybe somewhere where it doesn’t hurt to breathe, somewhere where they can go to sleep in peace without the knowledge that they may not wake up tomorrow, a place without fears, without guilt, or regrets, I wonder what kills you first among fear, guilt, ot regret?

My eyes close and flutter, dreams or nightmares, of course nightmares, of course nightmares.