This Is Me Leaving You But Not Letting Go Of You

I still love you, I really do.

It’s the kind of love where I pray for your happiness, but my happiness doesn’t depend on you anymore.

It’s the kind of love where I wish the best for you, but keeping in touch with you isn’t what’s best for us anymore.

It’s the kind of love where if you needed my help, I would be there for you, but I wouldn’t be able to stay.

It’s the kind of love where certain places we’ve been remind me of you and make me smile halfway, and not all the way, because it hits me that you only met me halfway.

And now, now it is the way it is because I need to heal more than I need to hurt. I need more happy nights than helpless nights. I need more laughter than loneliness. Most importantly, I need to know that the painful nights of screaming and crying have finally ended so I can open doors to receiving love the right way.

And when I receive love all the way, I’ll still love you the way I did after we went our own ways. I’ll still love you from a distance, but I won’t be desperate for you.

I’ll move on and reminisce on the old times, which will encompass both good and bad, but more bad than good.

I’ll be on a new path, and I hope you will be too. I hope you will love me the way I do, but from far and never too close.

I hope you will be able to love someone new all the way – the way you weren’t able to love me.

I hope you never breathe a day feeling incomplete by the one you expected to complete you.

I hope you will make it a priority to give someone more happy days than half your days.

I hope you never have to pass by a place or a person smiling halfway, but instead with all your heart filling your lungs with nothing but joy.

And if we cross paths in the future, I will look at you with the person you love and I will never feel like you owe me anything but a prayer. A quiet prayer in your own mind that I receive love that will fulfill me in all the right ways.