35 Hilarious Tweets From The Fake Vice Account That Are Even Better Than The Real Thing
"We dressed Paris Hilton as a slightly sexy Hitler and made a Vine of her shouting at a picture of Larry David in Prague." - @Vice_Is_Hip
By 
Nico Lang
Last month, the @Vice_Is_Hip Twitter account took parody to another level. The basic formula for each tweet is to take a celebrity or pop culture reference, throw in a foreign location, add some drugs to the mix and see what happens. However, the truly great thing is that many of them look like real Vice headlines, a satirical hyperreality indistinguishable from reality.
Like The Onion, this might not be real life, but it sounds awesome. I’d read this magazine, and here are 35 of the best headlines from Alternate Universe Vice.
1.
‘Everybody just wants to fuck Goofy’: the X rated Disney brothel that’s the toast of Tehran
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 22, 2013
2.
Find out how we got jobs at BuzzFeed, and why our first assignment was to have Miley Cyrus assassinated with ricin — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 19, 2013
3.
“Don’t make me drop Snorlax on you, bro” – Why El Salvador’s teenage gangs have started using Pokemon instead of pistols to settle debates — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 12, 2013
4.
We drink Saki and pickpocket passengers on the Shinkansen bullet train with Japan’s first fully robotic sociopath
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) September 25, 2013
5.
We entered the WWE and wrestled with our consciences
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 12, 2013
6.
“Are they killing her?” – We introduced hardcore porn to a remote Amazonian tribe who had never seen moving images before — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 20, 2013
7.
“It WAS me” – Shaggy finally comes clean after living a lie for 13 years — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 12, 2013
8.
Talking bombs, jihad and Miley Cyrus with the homeless in Houston
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) September 20, 2013
9.
We dressed Paris Hilton as a slightly sexy Hitler and made a Vine of her shouting at a picture of Larry David in Prague
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 13, 2013
10.
“I’ll could have you all shot” – We secretly recorded Taylor Swift’s astonishingly violent meltdown backstage at Rock In Rio — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 19, 2013
11.
We infiltrated the Hezbollah stronghold where they’re preparing to relaunch Friendster — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) September 22, 2013
12.
We made a song that only dogs can hear with the XX in Oslo
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 14, 2013
13.
‘Has anyone got any Rizla?’ – the rave party that started in June 1995 and is still going strong, despite 83 deaths and 6 births
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 20, 2013
14.
‘He will cry like baby’ – The Bosnian warlord determined to punish AC Slater for snubbing Kelly Kapowski in Season 3 of Saved by the Bell — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 14, 2013
15.
We met the Moss Side Rastafarian gang who are combating the bad-crack dealers and vicious lady-pushers by starting a Rubik’s cube league — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) September 19, 2013
16.
“They call us watery lesbians” – We spend a tense 72 hours under house arrest with Afghanistan’s only synchronized swimming team
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 14, 2013
17.
“No, YOU can go YOUR own way” – We get rapid on amphetamines, drive Fleetwood Mac out to the middle of nowhere, and leave them there
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 18, 2013
18.
We asked child killer Ian Huntley to qreview celebrity fragrances. His favourite was Fantasy by Britney Spears — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) September 25, 2013
19.
How Pixar’s decision to release an animated 3D version of Shame will change the way you think about cinema forever — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 19, 2013
20.
We guilt-tripped Andre 3000 into shooting a taxi-driver in Queens, and then blackmailed him into making a terrible dubstep album
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 15, 2013
21.
We spent a week killing corrupt mobile phone factory owners in Bolivia with Nicki Minaj, and then blamed it all on Facebook
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) September 26, 2013
22.
We hung out with the Paragayuan tribe whose entire belief system is based on the 1993 Emilio Estevez movie Judgment Night — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 17, 2013
23.
‘I always wanted to help people to fly’: We gave Ryan Reynolds so much cocaine we convinced him he was the founder of Ryanair — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 21, 2013
24.
We took meow meow with a Vietnamese sex offender and we didn’t even write down what happened
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) September 19, 2013
25.
We tried to sell used scud missiles to urban outfitters
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) September 24, 2013
26.
We made unnecessary threats against Azelia Banks’ niece, and snapchatted the inevitable fallout — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 16, 2013
27.
We went jeans shopping with Tel Aviv’s most militant hipsters — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 21, 2013
28.
How Apple Martin, Peaches, Neneh Cherry and Halle Berry formed a celebrity supergroup, ‘Fruit Salad’
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 17, 2013
29.
Find out why we gave Paul McCartney pure heroin and forced him to dance at gunpoint in a Phuket nightclub for a charity of his choice
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 11, 2013
30.
Why photocopying is the new urban paintball — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) September 19, 2013
31.
“It is like living in a hell made of random letters” – Why the classic word game Boggle is tearing Pakistan apart — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 11, 2013
32.
“It was utterly astonishing” – How a Spanish high school’s musical version of Human Centipede almost finished off pop culture for good
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 18, 2013
33.
“I just didn’t get it” – Why Werner Herzog totally rejected Tom Cruise’s idea for an all white remake of Shaft In Africa — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 20, 2013
34.
We converted Bruno Marrs to communism and threw him a flashmob party in Havana, before denouncing him as an enemy of the people — VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 5, 2013
35.
Why Kabul is the new Williamsburg, man
— VICE (@Vice_Is_Hip) October 8, 2013
