40 Things I Think About Before Falling Asleep

Did I lock the doors?

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After an exhausting day of work, nothing feels better than when my head hits against the pillow and my body’s tension subsides into the mattress. I can never fall straight asleep, so I think about things…

1. Are all the lights shut off?
2. Did I leave any cups or dishes out?
3. Did I lock the doors?
4. Did I lock my car doors?
5. What time do I need to get up tomorrow?
6. What time is it now?
7. If I fall asleep right this second, I’ll get (this) much sleep; that should be OK.
8. What are my plans this week?
9. What’s going on the rest of the month?
10. Oh crap, bills are due soon.
11. What articles do I have to do for work?
12. When are their deadlines?
13. What other jobs could I pursue with a journalism degree?
14. How will I meet someone when I stress so much about work?
15. Will I ever get married?
16. What will she be like?
17. Have I met her already?
18. How the hell will we afford it?
19. How will I propose?
20. Will I have kids?
21. What will they look like?
22. Will I have a boy, a girl, both or multiples?
23. How the hell will I pay for their college tuition?
24. If I have a boy, will he be more into sports or music and the arts?
25. If I have a girl, will be attracted to bad boys or gentlemen?
26. Oh my God, if I have a girl, I’m going to dread the day she dates.
27. I should work out more.
28. That reminds me, where is my “Do you even lift, bro?” shirt?
29. Is Tupac alive?
30. I hope Tupac is alive. That’d be sick.
31. If that Ali chick on Pretty Little Liars can do it, so can he.
32. I still can’t believe that there will be a sixth and seventh season of PLL.
33. They should’ve ended after three seasons and made it a great series.
34. All this “Who is A?” crap annoys me.
35. Who the hell is A?!
36. Screw this.
37. I’m tired.
38. What time is it now?
39. If I fall asleep right this second, I’ll get (this) much sleep; I guess that’s OK.
40. I think way too much before I sleep. Thought Catalog Logo Mark


About the author

Mike Zacchio

Mike is a New York-based writer and admitted hopeless romantic. If Ted Mosby and Carrie Bradshaw had a son, it would be him. When he’s not writing about love, dating, and relationships, he’s working his actual job as a sports reporter and columnist.

Tune into his podcast, “Heart Of The Matter” here.