Michael Malice

If we could pause our pretensions for moment, we’d realize that there are many things that every writer can be thankful for.

Other than the loss of a family member, losing one’s computer is probably the most traumatic thing a young person will be forced to endure.

Leave them feeling admired, not used. Then feel free to lean on them again in the future.

Landing a literary agent is the first professional goal that most aspiring writers give themselves. An agent is industrial proof that you have talent—actual, marketable talent—and aren’t just some jerk with pipe dreams plodding on with a pet project.

One of punk’s founding fathers has basically turned into the typical grandfather.

We’ve all been there: One of your friends is dating someone who is quite simply the worst, and you just don’t understand what they see in this other person.

It’s bizarre how many people have told me that being a Cash Cab contestant is on their bucket list.

1. Insist that Canada isn’t really a country.

When it comes to personal interactions, broadcasting makes for bad networking.

ow is Kim Jong Un different from Kim Jong Il? He has put a shiny, happy smiling face to the regime and persuaded the press to focus on basketball players instead of twenty-four million people living in total, constant oppression.

Don’t write the book you want to write; write the book that you can sell.

I turned thirty-eight earlier this year. If I’d asked myself during my early twenties whether that would make me old, my answer would have been an unabashed “yes.”

Learning to say “no” is how we define ourselves as people. It’s the border between the self and those who view you as a resource.

All I have to say to myself is, “Nothing you ever worried about has ever happened.”

Of course Shakespeare was great for his time. So is rotten food.

2. There will be a typo that will haunt you for life.

Never edit as you write.

To call North Korea “crazy” is wildly inaccurate, because the Kim regime has an enormous amount of self-awareness.