You Deserve to Be Valued (So Never Date Outside Your Wage Range)
Where people invest their time, energy and RESOURCES is where they invest their heart.
By Luis Pabon
NEWSFLASH BROKE ASSES,
I no longer date outside of my wage range! I no longer date men who are CEO’s of nothing incorporated. I no longer entertain the likes of men who try to romance me with excuses as to why they can’t pick up the check from time to time. Quite simply: these types of men bore me with their unoriginality. They are becoming a standard cliche, an anticipated punchline that I no longer find amusing. I mean let’s face it: There are but so many value meals you can eat before they start to lose their value. And by accepting such token gestures of interest, you set a standard and send the message that you’re not worth more than just a big mac with the generosity of extra mac sauce as a symbol of their undying love.
I realize that the man I want is going to have to come with more than just a hard dick and a hot pocket. He is going to have to qualify for my love. So many men nowadays try and date above their wage. It is as though they are applying for a doctor’s position with only a ninth grade education. And while such levels of bravado and false confidence are cute, they do nothing to speak to the need for stability as reflected by how one balances their checkbook. I now (like my hair) have grown my standards out. I now require that a man have enough disposable income to be able to afford my love because contrary to Jenny from the Block, my love DOES cost a thing!
What inspired this conclusion is the realization that where people invest their time, energy and RESOURCES is where they invest their heart.
In relationships, I tend to give 100 percent in hard heart capital. I now require that my partner match or exceed my level of investment if the union has any chance at success. Too many times I have dated below my wage and have paid for it in more ways than one. I have been cheated on, deceived, abandoned and abused as a result of dating below my level. There’s a saying that goes “water seeks its own level.”
Those men I have dated in the past could not appreciate my diamond heart because they were glass trinkets who suffered from Inferiority complexes. As a result I found myself having to pay for their feelings of inadequacy and borrow against what I know I deserve. As pure water who has consciously filtered out the toxins from my refined well, I now seek my own level. I have graciously learned that people only love and value that which they have earned and suffered for. Under that logic, I can either make your life a living hell or you can get your weight up financially and start showering me with decadence.
My new motto is: I WILL BE EARNED OR I WON’T BE ENJOYED.
I deserve the best that love can buy. And you deserve the best of my sacrifice. Either way it’s a win-win situation when you bet on the pleasure of my love.
On the surface it might appear that I am a cold hearted gold digger looking only for financial returns on the emotional investments I make when in fact what I am is a man tired of giving my heart to people who don’t value it. People who easily discard my sacrifices and take my love for granted because they think it will always be there. I have gotten tired of doing the most for people who treat me like the least. I now realize that I am saving the most for the man with the gold. There are traditional symbols of power: Money, love and sex. Love is also a symbol of power and I’m tired of giving mine away for free.
My power comes with a price and in my next relationship power will be shared equally or it will not be shared at all.
Some men (in an effort to maintain power and control) will try to find excuses to give you less as in any deal they will always come to you with their bottom first to see just how much they can get away with and save before they meet your complaints. Even in relationships people err on the side of prudence and try to be cost effective with their love. Given this cold, austere reality, never take the first offer! Some dudes will try to skimp on you and line their pockets with your “happy slave” gratitude all the while spinning hard luck stories laced with promises of what they want to do for you. Don’t buy it!
Realize that for one, people always find money for the things they want. If they wanted you, they would find a way.
The more excuses you accept the more they are going to give and the more your value plummets. Two, realize that some of these men promise you the world that they still owe their ex’s. Somehow the world never comes when you want it. It is always pending some lame excuse.
So as it pertains to dating within your wage range, remember to never forget you as you dictate your worth by what you continue to accept. Don’t let the fear of being alone cause you to allow others to degrade you and cause you to degrade yourself. You are a king who deserves more.
In the past, I have exceeded expectations and accepted limitations and it has exacted a high toll. But after a while, you just get tired of paying for everything and overstanding everything. That is when you begin to demand your worth. PLEASE, DEMAND YOUR WORTH. Never settle for less than you deserve because you deserve the most of it all. Never forget that.