Lisa Woods

“I searched for a friend and found them nowhere. I was a friend and found them everywhere.”

“Gemini is left alone. She’s already dead inside and her life is punishment enough.”

Everyone discovers their difficulties differently. The important thing is that you do something with that discovery.

You won’t be able to come when it matters – during sex.

Only those close to celebrities know how fame really changed them…or how it didn’t.

“He told me he doesn’t bother memorizing anyone’s name until after three months of knowing them.”

These are pretty basic, ladies. I’m surprised there are people out there doing this stuff.

Did your name make the cut?

“Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban”

“I love her but she’s going to die alone.”

It’s time to get inspired…

“Put out my hand for him to hold and he high fived me.”

One thing is clear, ladies. We do not understand balls at all.

These stories are both beautiful and incredibly sad. Bring a tissue.

These things don’t make you cute. They make you an asshole.

They say that you should only marry for true love…what if “they” are wrong?

It was her lips, it was her enthusiasm, she kissed me like she wanted to kiss me forever, we could not even stop to breath…we kissed and kissed until the bar closed. I could just not get enough.

“I did what any rational person would do. I had my best friend post the news on my facebook wall that I was killed in a car accident at work.”