All The Little Things I’m Choosing To Leave Behind
I’m leaving behind the pressure that comes along with feeling like I’m supposed to be somewhere else, doing more.
By Leena Lomeli
All the little things I’m choosing to leave behind are all of the things that aren’t conducive with exactly who I want to be in the world.
Life is heavy and the things you carry with you while you live it can’t be any heavier. You can’t take everything with you wherever you go, you were never supposed to.
There’s freedom is seeing purpose in the pain and knowing you’re better for experiencing it, but there’s happiness in letting that purpose be the thing that moves you rather than the weight of the pain itself.
I’m leaving behind every commitment I made when I wasn’t truly myself, everything that didn’t honor me. Every choice I made when I wasn’t walking in my shoes and making my own footprints.
I’m leaving behind the girl who needed constant reassurance from the world, the one who had security taken from way too young of an age.
I’m leaving behind the pressure that comes along with feeling like I’m supposed to be somewhere else, doing more.
I’m leaving behind the fear that once led me to living my life with a narrative that wasn’t really ever mine to begin with, the parts of my life that were masked with unsettled trauma.
I’m leaving behind my anxiety around loss and everything else that prevented me from loving and being loved by the right people.
I’m leaving behind the notion that I’m not good enough or that my life won’t be beautiful, all the things that are so far from the truth.
I’m leaving behind every ounce of guilt for not knowing better, being honest, or being kind. The words I did or didn’t say, the tone I said them in, and the way I went about communicating + processing the hard stuff.
Everything that doesn’t align with who I want to be right now must go. Anything that hinders rather than helps, anything that stems from unhealed places, anything that creates war where there should be ease— I’m leaving it behind.
To all the little things I’m choosing to leave behind, thank you for pushing me ahead. Thank you for being the things I carry with me in the weight of my footsteps moving forward rather than the weight I carry inside of me.