When Your Guy Friend Gets A Girlfriend

The girlfriend may feel insecure. I’ve been an insecure girlfriend once myself; I’ve been on that end of the narrative. But since then, I’ve also been on the other side. I’ve been the girl who was friends with a guy who then got a girlfriend. I’ve been the girl who was cast aside once said girlfriend entered into the picture. I’ve been the girl who had to see the change.

A stray cat. A faded pair of blue jeans. An overdue library book that goes unnoticed, stashed somewhere in the corner of the room where the dust collects and settles.

What about the friendship, the connection, that was already solidified? What about the banter, the laughter, the easygoing rapport? Where do they all go?

They go into the jealous thoughts of the new girlfriend. They disappear into the unspoken rules and regulations that occur once he discovers what to do with his hormones; once he enters into the realm of handholding and late night phone calls and romantic dinners in outdoor cafes with bottles of wine. Or once there’s Love. I get it. It has manifested. It is beautiful. I understand how natural shifts progress as they should. But severing the tie completely? That part is a bit harder to swallow. It goes down like something bitter. A shot of alcohol that burns the throat.

He’s no longer communicating. He’s not really interested in what you’re writing or what you’re dreaming or what you’re doing with your summer, with your life. He’s not really there for advice or guidance or pep talks when the going gets rough and you feel sad. It’s as if you were part of a ‘before’ series and this girlfriend comprises the ‘after.’ This ‘after’ features the present, the future.

Scrubbing away unwanted grease. Erasing the imprint of bold chalk on the sidewalk. Unloading the contents of a suitcase that are too heavy and too much of a burden to still keep tucked inside.

But what about the friend who was there before she came along? What about her story?