Lauren Jarvis-Gibson

My OCD is not wanting to be clean. It’s not mopping my apartment floors ever day. It’s not driving back home to make sure I didn’t light the place on fire. It’s not rearranging my desk a million times a day. It’s not rinsing and lathering and repeating.

Sometimes, it’s a person’s decision to be single. Sometimes, people just don’t want a significant other. And it doesn’t mean that anything is wrong with them. It doesn’t mean that they are lonely. It doesn’t mean that their standards are too high.

He does not deserve to have a part in your story. He doesn’t deserve to have a space. He doesn’t deserve to have any piece of your heart, because he never had the guts to truly love you.

Scorpio: You spend too much time on your phone and comparing and contrasting yourself to your peers. You don’t know how to be truly happy with yourself and with your appearance because you’re too busy looking into other people’s lives. You have little to no self esteem, and you need to work on it ASAP.

As an Aquarius, you often feel lonely and like you are all alone in this world. The sign you’re becoming more mature and grown up is when you can be alone and not feel lonely. You need to start enjoying time spent by yourself. You don’t always have to be doing something with someone else to enjoy your life.

Fight for your own self and fight like hell even when no one else believes in you. You know yourself better than anyone and you know that if you put your mind to something, you will accomplish it. Don’t let the haters win. Don’t let them take you down and crush your spirit. 

My OCD is exactly this: it’s thoughts that spin round and round inside my head. Terrible, scary, dark thoughts that just pop in and out and in and out. 

You know that you will never be perfect. You know that you are a human. And you have had to learn along the way that life is going to hand you obstacles and battles to fight. You will fail and fall and fail some more. But in that, you learn more about yourself and you grow into a better person.

Why the hell do I feel like this? Why do I feel so uncontrollable? Why do I already feel like a failure? 

One day you’re going to wake up and not feel the void inside of your heart. And one day, you’re going to wake up and not miss the warm body that used to lay next to you. 

I don’t need you to love me, if you don’t. I don’t need you to lie and say things you don’t mean, just to make me happy. I don’t need you to pay any attention to me, if all I am is a joke to you. 

You didn’t just lose a person. You didn’t just lose a girlfriend. You didn’t just lose a friend. You lost your opportunity to have a future with me. You lost a lifetime. A lifetime you could have had…with me.