What Loving Yourself Really Means, Because It’s Not Just Spending Time Alone

Loving yourself is getting out of your comfort zone even when it's scary. It's going to that party when you know no one. It's chatting up that cute guy or girl that keeps eyeing you. It's making a new friend and feeling all at once like you are understood. It's deciding to follow your intuition…

By

girl on mountain
Kristopher Roller

Loving yourself is not something that is easy. But it’s not impossible either. It takes hard work. It takes dedication and patience. And it most certainly isn’t as simple as spending more time alone.

Loving yourself isn’t locking yourself up in your room. It isn’t always about being alone. It isn’t always about eating by yourself. It isn’t always about attending concerts on your own.

Loving yourself can be helped by spending time quality on your own. It’s saying no to an invitation where you feel like your mental health is going down the drain. It’s saying no to a party when you need to slow down and relax.

Sure, it’s important to make time for yourself to regain energy. And it’s important to learn how to be alone, and not be lonely. But there’s a thin line between spending time alone, and isolation.

Sometimes, loving yourself is all about saying ‘yes’, even if it’s uncomfortable or unlike you.

Loving yourself is asking for help when you need it. It’s having the guts to calling up your parents or a therapist when you need to talk. It’s finding the strength inside of yourself to know that it’s okay not to be okay. But it’s also about finding the strength in yourself to seek guidance and to know when you can’t do something on your own.

Loving yourself is getting out of your comfort zone even when it’s scary. It’s going to that party when you know no one. It’s chatting up that cute guy or girl that keeps eyeing you. It’s making a new friend and feeling all at once like you are understood. It’s deciding to follow your intuition even when it’s terrifying.

Loving yourself is taking chances. It’s buying that plane ticket to that place where you have always wanted to go to, but held yourself back. It’s deciding to take that leap of faith, even when it seems ridiculous.

Loving yourself is being brave even when you mess up. It’s learning how to love your imperfect parts. It’s learning how to make mistakes and not to beat yourself up for a week about it.

Loving yourself is going on that first date even though you want to puke all over yourself and even when your hands are shaking. Loving yourself is about doing things that scare you, and all the while realizing that you will be alright in the end.

Loving yourself isn’t a walk in the park. It’s nowhere near easy. It’s confusing and is definitely not linear. It’s a mountain climb followed by another taller mountain.

The main thing to remember is to remind yourself that you’re allowed to fall. And it’s to remember that you have faults and you have imperfections. And it’s to love those parts of yourself just as much as you love the good and the brighter parts.

Loving yourself isn’t just about learning how to be alone and be content. It’s also about coming together with your loved ones, and learning how to let their love always be inside of you. Thought Catalog Logo Mark