Laura Kennedy

Today I have to say goodbye you; my sweet fuck buddy, my dear fuckboy.

You wanted easy love and I always demanded more

Please remember that the memories that trigger you do not represent who you are in the current moment.

You will feel found again.

You heal by being vulnerable.

But I am learning to finally let you go
finally allowing my heart to rid itself of the space you filled.

Please don’t think these feelings are going to remain. You will one day understand that loneliness is an okay feeling. Loneliness is something that you need to feel.

I can’t settle for men not realizing what they have when they have me. I can’t settle for men disrespecting women.

You come to understand that loneliness when you are with someone is far worse than being single. Loneliness is not something that needs to be feared.

Home isn’t another person.

You deserve to move on from the loneliness. You deserve to move on from the longing of another body next to yours.

You deserve to be with someone who puts effort into wanting to be with you.

I hope you are able to see that the world isn’t a cruel place and that you deserve happiness.

Maybe we should be allowed to walk into the fire with a fuckboy by our side until it fades away (because it will).

I will choose men who will appreciate being in my presence. I will choose men who will respect me the way you didn’t know how.

Your girlfriends will save you when your insecurities are screaming at you to be broken because of him, your girlfriends will tell you that you are beautiful and why he wasn’t even worth your time.

Today was supposed to be your wedding day but you decided it wasn’t going to be. Today wasn’t going to be the day that you would regret for the rest of your life. Today wasn’t going to be the day that so many of your friends and family knew shouldn’t happen, but could never muster the courage to say it aloud.

I can’t hold you.
I can’t touch you.
I can’t feel your body on mine.