Laura Jayne Martin

Ohhhh my god. How did you even get to be a king?!

It all started two weeks ago when I won second prize in that beauty contest.

Sometimes I don’t understand people who call themselves “awkward.” Really?

Scented Candles are pretty much the most important things in life after health, love, and finding a karaoke song that is appropriate for your vocal range.

IMAGINE A YELLOWISH ORANGE SPHERE. NOW IMAGINE IT IS EDIBLE. = A grapefruit

Normann Fir – You have a lot of crazy dreams. Most of them are about finding the proper medication for your night terrors.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7z0Qsf0g1UY&w=584&h=390] Comedian Kyle Dunnigan just released his Christmas album, “Craig’s All-Star Rockin’ Christmas, You Guys!” It features some insane songs, some great guest stars, and actual musical talent.

You guys might not know this, but I am the host of an amazing podcast series called “My Totally Real Podcast That Is Real.” Every episode features amazing guests, twists, turns, and anything else you would expect from a podcast…

1.The Hunger Games, Actually Set in a dystopian future, this film weaves together the lives of a colorful cast of idiosyncratic ne’erdowells who repeatedly fall in love during their wacky quest to survive the holidays! 2.

There are a lot of big bad things. The world is full of them.  They are smeared, and gray, and hovering over us. They hide behind suits, or masks, or collections of cells.

I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t want to write about it. I just want to sit here and feel it. Then, I want to look over and see you.

1. Find all of your socks.