The path to whatever your notion of success is will likely not be linear. Don’t take continuous personal growth for granted.

1. Losing Motivation For The 22,467th time.

Become employed as the “Before” model in “Before and After” plastic surgery ads.

Like it’s some mystical new age therapy with intangible healing properties. It’s not Kaballah, it’s a food allergy. Are you into reiki, homeopathy, or the healing power of crystals, magnets or Head of the Class reruns? You might be a phony celiac.

You compose a text that’s talking crap on someone and accidentally send it to the person you’re trashing. Seriously, is there a more terrifying scenario out there for 20-somethings, other than perhaps talking on the phone?

Despite the fact that you, too, used a fake ID just a few short years ago, you are filled with righteous indignation. “Wait your turn, you brats,” you long to say, “Go drink 4 Loko in your bedrooms until you turn 21, like God intended.”

Glitter keychains that said things like “100% Angel.” (Bonus points if they said “100% Devil” on the back.)

XXXtina’s music usually makes me cry tears of terror rather than genuine emotion but for her famous self-love anthem “Beautiful”, she actually manages to make a positive mark on my feelings.

8. You’re more comfortable at a Renaissance fair full of fake knights than a nightclub full of fake Renaissance men.

Eat, Pray, Love AKA The Basic Bitch Bible changed your life. One day, when you find yourself trapped in a loveless marriage to a rich man in Connecticut, you’re going to leave him to go find yourself through extensive prayer and pizza.