Krossland Shaw

There are memories that stay locked firmly in my mind of which I am both unable and unwilling to let go of between us. I find myself crawling through them from time to time, remembering what it was like to hold you so close.

I think of you the way people stare at an accident on the highway. The way they stand on an overpass, their mouths agape while they look on without lending a hand, most locked in place as though their puppeteer felt his heart collapse.

I knew from the moment that I met you there was a storm brewing in our hearts. 

I’m still afraid of that riptide tearing me back, drowning me again like all the others. Hold me above water and I promise I won’t ever falter.

Our love is blurry to me, I try to measure it in heartbeats, but it races so fast when I see you that I wouldn’t dare try to keep track. 

I don’t want to admit that we might both fade into something different, bleeding our love into other hearts.

Somewhere between the home that I used to own and the future that I used to hold, I am there with an earthquake in my heart.

The goodbyes weren’t crushing, until this very last one.

We have these moments when we’re in love, where we point out “I think that is where I lost her. That’s where I lost it all”.