13 Men Confess The Dumbest Reason They Broke Up With Someone

"She smiled too much. It was creepy."

By

@stefanopirini

1. “Her laugh was terrible. Think Janice in Friends but soooooo much worse. I avoided making her laugh in public because I’d get embarrassed being with her.”

— Dwayne, 25


2. “I actually really liked her, but she had the same name as my mom. Couldn’t do it.”

— Sam, 23


3. “She refused to watch Game of Thrones with me.”

— Nathan, 24


4. “Whenever we went out to eat, she insisted on Instagramming the damn food. I wouldn’t have cared if it was a few times or when it’s a REALLY cool looking meal, but it was constant. Nobody cares about your brunch that much.”

— Derek, 25


5. “She couldn’t hold her liquor. Going out with her meant I was going to end up babysitting.”

— Sayeed, 23


6. “I’m not super organized, but I do like to maintain a general level of neatness. Her apartment was always a mess. It turned me off pretty instantly.”

— Travis, 29


7. “Her sex noises were too f*cking weird to handle. Like squeaky and high-pitched. It felt like I was having sex with a cartoon character. No thanks.”

— Adam, 25


8. “It is honestly the dumbest reason, but I couldn’t stand the way she texted. She was one of those ‘what r u up 2?’ types and I got annoyed whenever she sent me a message. I like my words fully spelled out.”

— Jeremy, 27


9. “She loved eating tuna sandwiches and the smell would linger. It made me nauseated and I feel bad because that seems like a super stupid reason, but…just…gross.”

— Jakob, 25


10. “She smiled too much. It was creepy.”

— Michael, 25


11. “All of her clothes were hella childish. Like Forever 21 shirts with dumb sayings. ‘Wine Forever’ or ‘Shopping Is My Cardio’. Terrible style.”

— Stephen, 29


12. “We were dating for a month or so and things were cool, but when we were hooking up, she told me she doesn’t like receiving or giving oral sex. Not to be a dick, but that’s not a relationship I want to be in.”

— Wayne, 31


13. “She spoke super monotone. I felt like I was gonna fall asleep whenever she talked. Had serious flashbacks to high school and watching the clock waiting for class to end.”

— Connor, 27 Thought Catalog Logo Mark


About the author

Kris Miller

popcorn aficionado & full time hopeless romantic.