Admit It, NYC Is Totally Overrated

A little while back, I wrote a Thought Catalog article that argued against some negative misconceptions people have about living in NYC. In totality, I appealed the criticisms by claiming that walking everywhere was wonderful, loudness was goodness and no green space ironically led to a population more in sync with their surroundings. But let’s be real. Life isn’t always happy hours and rainbows, here. So, just to be fair, here are a few positive misconceptions people have about living in NYC and why maybe, for some of us, these things really aren’t so great, after all.

It’s “The city that never sleeps,” you guys!

There’s something alluring and almost magical about that notion, isn’t there? But do you know what can really suck about living in a city that never sleeps? Yup, you guessed it: NOT SLEEPING. Whether it’s because you were a dAnciNg QUeeN at PHD Dream all night, or because some gem of a human being decided to lay on their horn for 10 minutes straight at 2AM directly outside your apartment OR because your boss is one of those bosses that correlates longer hours to higher productivity (as if we’re still in the height of the industrial revolution) having poor sleeping habits can really catch up with you. Unfortunately, it usually does somewhere between the hours of 9AM and 5PM the following day when you’re – you know, at work. And given that New York is, in fact, not Spain, conking out for a midday siesta is generally unacceptable behavior.

For most, the solution to this problem lies somewhere between earplugs and rehab. For everyone else, get used to squeezing in stall naps in the company bathroom.

Brunch

I’m just going to come right out and say it: brunch is super overrated. You pay upwards of $35 to drag yourself out of bed and force down a nauseatingly rich breakfast platter that would have otherwise been delicious had you not just taken banana Jameson shots a mere six hours prior. Oh, and you have to gulp down at least one each of a Mimosa, a Bloody Mary and maybe even a Poinsettia because, hey, you paid $10 for the unlimited drinks add-on and life is all about having variety. Even if you happen to be a teetotaler and are therefore neither hung over nor tacking on the extra $10 to your fair share of the bill, brunch can still throw a serious wrench into one’s schedule. But alas, some people truly love their brunch and go around brunching every weekend like nobody’s business. Kudos to you and your midday bubby – I’m almost jealous.

Personally, though, the thought of sacrificing an entire day to one meal is anxiety-inducing for me. What can I say? I’m an all-meals equality activist, I guess. If you think about it, you really have to plan the whole weekend around brunching. Here’s how it goes: don’t stay up too late the night prior, be careful about your breakfast choice morning-of, and forget about fancy dinner plans that night because you’ll be full and tired from that silly $10 all-you-can-drink Andre special.

Ugh.

The Holiday Season

Just kidding!

Christmas in the city is just about the greatest thing on earth – that is, if you’re a meant-to-be-Elf like me. I’m all about the holidays. To the point where I might be that person you block Facebook statuses from around Christmas time… #whatever. But, non-elves might find the constant barrage of Santa Clauses and all things red, white and green vaguely nauseating and, quite frankly, denominationally biased. I get that. And other holidays can be a little tricky, too. The Fourth of July fireworks are supposedly spectacular to witness. However, I wouldn’t really know since this past year I was wedged between skyscrapers down in the financial district and could only faintly hear the sparkly explosions. Was that better or worse than actually catching a glimpse of the action while being unavoidably shouldered in midtown? I couldn’t tell you. But, I’d probably take beach fireworks over that any day.

Right about now some crowd-loving, night-owl of a resident who has Thanksgiving brunch plans with their entire family at Rock Center is probably queuing up one hell of a rebuttal comment to all of my very-clearly personal opinions above. But you know what? That’s great. Because as trite as this might be delivered: that’s what New York is all about. The variation of opinions and preferences and religions floating around this city is staggering. But our ability to coexist – to thrive – while supporting our individual selves and communities is even more striking. And that accomplishment, dear friends, is certainly not overrated.