Kendra Syrdal

She was never embarrassed to say your name or to hold your hand in public. She was never unsure of where she stood because the answer was always, “Right next to him.”

Yes, so far it’s been more fun.

Someday she’ll probably burp and it will shake the foundation of your home. Hazard of the hops.

Stop letting the inherit need to not rock the boat keep you from getting things off your chest. It’s not whatever; it’s important. You’re not whatever. You’re important.

She tasted like the wine I swam in when I was freshly broken, and like the confusion I once called my best friend. She reminded me of the huckleberries we’d eat before they were fully ripe, but we liked the way they bit our tongues so we kept coming back for more.

If you Google me, you will see my heartbreak splayed across your computer screen. You will see my pleas to be loved and my acceptance of change and my mourning of people who are gone.

Leave a candle in your bathroom just in case, and have some around to make sure that your place always smells like a place where you would want to be. There’s nothing worse than a stinky house.

You are completely within your right to stand up and say, “I didn’t like that.” Your feelings are legitimate; do not ever believe otherwise. By ignoring it when you’re unhappy you are permitting your own unhappiness.

You’re both adults. Stop asking if you should cut their meat into bite-sized pieces for them. If you can’t handle letting them make their own decisions get a sperm donor, not a boyfriend.

I’m holding off because you aren’t here. You’re behind texts and unbooked plane tickets and not holding my hand or pouring your own glass of Pinot Grigio. You’re past highways and speeding tickets, instead of rolling over in my bed from across 600 sq ft and shooting that stupid, stupid smile in my direction.

The scene in Best in Show where the pet shop employee has the audacity to suggest that a fish is the same as a bee hit way too close to home. Your dog would absolutely be able to tell the difference. People these days…

You’re probably going to watch an in flight movie without headphones because you won’t spring for the $2 pair they offer, and you’re going to ask your seat-neighbor what’s happening every five minutes because she was smart enough to not lose the free pair Apple provided her with. Basically you’re a monster.