5 Lies Females Tell Themselves Every Day To Survive
To get through life, human beings will inevitably be put in situations where we have to reassure ourselves in order to make a big decision. Unfortunately, women make nearly everything into a big decision. Because of this, the need to have these reassurances ready and waiting for us to use is much greater; and over time, this habit has developed into a full-fledged characteristic of every female. So here they are, five of the most common lies we use to get through the day.
5. “This is the only unhealthy thing I’m eating all day.”
Also known as “I’ll workout extra hard later”, this is a common lie females tell themselves to cope with our poor decision-making throughout the day. That donut in the kitchen at work. The chocolate in the vending machine. French fries in general.
All of these landmines are strategically placed throughout our day to tempt us and test our faith in our metabolism. Do we look past these temptations? Do we reach for the apple instead? As much as we like to think we do, more often than not we tell ourselves we will make up for it later with a healthy dinner or extra hard workout. And by healthy dinner we mean “well I didn’t eat the last roll at Logan’s Roadhouse” and by extra workout we probably walked our dog after dinner. Down the driveway. Because he’s a Chihuahua. This lie helps us deny the reality of our inability to say no to sugar and the other delectable things that make us happier for the moment.
4. “I don’t read books for the sex scenes.”
Surprisingly (or not), any book that is wildly popular among a female-specific audience seems to be ripe with sex. Romantic love, wild one night stands, vampires and humans (you weirdos) – they all center around sex. We love to tell ourselves we read because we are intelligent and cultured and love feeding our brains. Yet no female can deny that the meat of the story sometimes gets skimmed over to get to the other meat part (pun intended).
Need proof? Look no further than 50 Shades of Grey. I’m not calling this book out because of the S&M scenes that everyone was so shocked about; I’m using it because it was wildly popular and the writing was terrible. It was bad story telling on top of bad editing. Multiple sunny days a week spent in a convertible in Seattle? Even Twilight could figure out the whole its-always-cloudy-in-Seattle thing. The poor writing is proof that no one paid attention to the stuff between the sex scenes. And speaking of Twlight – no. I’m not even going to get started on that.
3. “This will fit when I lose a few pounds.”
Women love shopping. And to support this habit, we store a myriad of available excuses as to why we should purchase a certain item, especially if we are on a budget. “So let’s use it as motivation to lose weight!” We think.
Yea, these pants are a little tight around the waste BUT it’s summer so I will be working out more, which means I will lose weight. So I should get these pants now as motivation. We’ve all done it. This lie allows us to erase the guilt we feel for buying new clothes when we complain about Walgreens asking us if we would like to donate $1 to cancer research at checkout. So maybe you’ll lose a few pounds and look great in those high-waisted jean shorts, right? No. You all still look like you’re wearing Huggies jean diapers.
2. “I’m putting my love life on hold for my career.”
Translation: I’m single. Very, very single. This lie is used a lot for women in their 20’s. “We’re so dedicated to our careers that we don’t have time to date”. Really? So you’ve been turning down all these prospects because of your career? “I’m sorry, I’m really interested in you but I don’t want to be in a relationship where I really enjoy spending a lot of time with you and it starts to cut into my overtime at work” said no female, ever. I mean, come on now – we’re women. We have the amazing ability to completely throw everything to the wind for the possibility of love.
This lie just makes us feel empowered about working and forget that all of our 24-year-old friends are getting married and we keep posting Instagrams of our dog.
1. “If it’s meant to be, it will work out in the end.”
This is the ultimate lie.
Females have the amazing talent to apply this scenario to literally ANY situation in our lives. It’s the lie of hope – that anything we are leaving (or left us) will be there, waiting for our return as if fate already decreed the outcome (like in movies). A relationship. “He will realize his mistake and come back to me if it’s meant to be.” A job. “If I take this new job, my old one will still be waiting there if it’s meant to be.” We rely on this elusive idea of fate to reinsure many of our big decisions.
This idea that there is something outside of us affecting the outcome takes the pressure off of big decisions we’ve made or decisions others have made that affect us. It hides our fear of the unknown and supports or façade of strength and independence; and for that, it is our most valued lie. 
